Category: Chinese

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It Dim Sum – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

Shortly after “moving on up to the east side, to a deluxe apartment in the sky,” George Jefferson was uncharacteristically late returning home.  Knowing George had gone to a Chinese restaurant after work, his dutiful wife Weezy asked neighbor Tom Willis what Chinese restaurant George might have visited.  Ever the gourmand, Tom asked what style of Chinese food George liked then proceeded to rattle off five different types of traditional Chinese cuisine available in the neighborhood: Mandarin, Sichuan, Hunan, Cantonese and Shandong.  Until that very moment I had no idea there were so many different styles of Chinese cuisine, wrongly believing there was only Chinese food period. That’s pretty much what most Americans believed even back in the 80s when…

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528 Sushi & Asian Cuisine – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

“No lady likes to snuggle and dine accompanied by a porcupine.” “He lit a match to check gas tank. They call him skinless Frank.” “A man, a miss, a car, a curve. He kissed the miss and missed the curve.” “Within this vale of toil and sin, your head goes bald but not your chin.” “Henry the Eighth sure had trouble. Short-term wives, long-term stubble.” Some of the more seasoned among us might remember that one of the best ways to break up the drudgery of traveling long distances on monotonous two-lane highways was to look for Burma Shave billboards. Humorous five-line poems adorned red signs one line at a time, each line in white capitalized blocked letters about 100-feet…

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Rising Star Chinese Eatery – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

Let’s get one thing straight. General Tso’s chicken is not some weird cold war Chinese one-upmanship response to Colonel Sanders’ Kentucky Fried Chicken. In other words, China did not deliberately seek to outdo the United States by creating a chicken dish and naming it for a General, a rank superior to the rank of Colonel. Not even close! Back in the early 50s, Colonel Harlan Sanders actually did create a revolutionary way of preparing poultry (pressure fried, eleven herbs and spices, yada, yada, yada). General Zuo Zongtang (romanized as Tso Tsung-t’ang), on the other hand, did not create the dish named for him. Nor did he ever eat it. In fact, he never even heard of it. It wasn’t even…

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The Birds Paradise Hot Pot – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

It was 2:15AM on a workday, a full four hours before my dreaded alarm clock was set to utter a tone surpassed for annoyance only by the screechy prattle on The View. Inexplicably my brain decided it was a good idea to play deejay and serenade me with Sukiyaki, the only Japanese pop song ever to top the charts across the fruited plain. Yep, my mind had been invaded by an earworm, a song that sticks with you long after the note is played. Akin to a broken record (millennials may have read about “records” in their history books) scratching the same chords over and over again, earworms can be nostalgic and pleasant or annoying and torturous, especially when they…

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P.F. Chang’s China Bistro – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

“Nothing is original. Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination. Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul. If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic. Authenticity is invaluable; originality is non-existent. And don’t bother concealing your thievery – celebrate it if you feel like it. In any case, always remember what Jean-Luc Godard said: “It’s not where you take things from – it’s where you take them to.” ~ Jim Jarmusch American Film Director I discovered that pithy pearl shortly after a recent email exchange with Gil’s thrilling pollmeister (my spellchecker still insists on “poltergeist”) Bob of the Village of Los Ranchos. We were deliberating whether to ask…

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Ming Dynasty – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

The Ming Dynasty (1368-1644) was renowned as one of the greatest periods of governmental and societal stability in the history of mankind. At its peak, the Ming dynasty made China a global superpower, influencing the known world in trade, culture and might. During this dynasty, agriculture developed significantly, dishes became more sophisticated, cookbooks were widely proliferated and noontime banquets became popular. Dishes such as sweet potatoes, corn, potatoes and sorghum were imported into China during this period while such local foods as the infamous “thousand-year egg” were introduced. Before long, history just might recognize the Ming Dynasty restaurant as one of, if not the, greatest Chinese restaurants in Albuquerque. Launched at 11AM on Sunday, April 27th, 2003, it returned our…

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Pop-Up Dumpling House – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

“And her dumplings were so light they would float in the air and you’d have to catch ’em to eat ’em.” ~Author: Fannie Flagg Think you know dumplings? Believe you’ve tried almost every type of dumpling there is? That’s what I thought until discovering a Wikipedia page called “List of dumplings” which essentially opened up a large world of ne’er sampled dumplings. For the glass-is-half-full types among us, this list is a challenge…an opportunity to broaden our dumpling horizons. Alas, such a horizon (and waist) broadening experience will mean crossing many borders. Not surprisingly, not every dumpling type is to be found in the Duke City, although you just might be surprised at just how many types of dumplings you…

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Amerasia & Sumo Sushi – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

Carpe Diem Sum–“seize the dim sum” at AmerAsia, the Alibi’s perennial selection for best dim sum in the city honors (diem sum, as spelled on AmerAsia’s menu is also a correct spelling). Dim sum, a Cantonese word that can be translated to “a little bit of heart,” “point of heart” and “touch the heart” has its genesis in the Chinese tea houses of the Silk Road. Weary sojourners would stop at tea houses for tea and a light snack (ergo, touch the heart). Over time, the popularity of the tasty little treasures offered at these tea houses led to larger restaurants serving dim sum meals until mid-afternoon, after which other Cantonese cuisine was made available. Today, dim sum buffets are…

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Tao Chinese Bistro – Rio Rancho, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

It’s highly unlikely ancient Chinese philosophers ever intended the concept of Tao to be used as an approach for the serial seduction of women, but that was the premise of the 2000 movie The Tao of Steve. Filmed in the Santa Fe area, this campy romantic comedy centered around a corpulent, underachieving former philosophy student who christened his approach after the somewhat stolid “cool” epitomized by three Steves: Steve McQueen, Steve McGarrett from Hawaii Five-O and Steve Austin from The Six Million Dollar Man. The Tao of Steve–which proves a very successful approach for sexual conquests–is comprised of three rules: ((1) Be desire-less. If your body language indicates a lack of interest, a woman’s attraction to you will increase. (2)…

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ABC Chinese Restaurant – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

NOTE:  The site which housed ABC Chinese for nearly four decades is now the home of ABC Cajun Seafood & Noodle House. Hungry sojourners venturing east on Menaul between Wyoming and Eubank will discover two of the dining options on this stretch are among Albuquerque’s elder statesmen in the Duke City’s Chinese restaurant community. You’ll first espy Ho Lo Ma, a venerable institution launched in 1972 and well on its way to a half-century of serving the Duke City. A couple blocks later lies a comparative newcomer named ABC Chinese which has been in business only since 1988. Both restaurants are anachronisms with many of the stereotypical trappings that typified Chinese restaurants in the 1960s and ’70s. Though showing their…

AlbuquerqueChineseRated 23

Chopstix – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno

And I find chopsticks frankly distressing. Am I alone in thinking it odd that a people ingenious enough to invent paper, gunpowder, kites and any number of other useful objects, and who have a noble history extending back 3,000 years haven’t yet worked out that a pair of knitting needles is no way to capture food? ~Bill Bryson The precise date in which chopsticks were first used has been lost in time. Archaeological evidence found in burial plots indicates they are at least 3,200 years old though some scholars believe they’ve been around even longer than that. Even the evolution of chopsticks is in debate. Some surmise that chopsticks evolved from the practice of using wooden sticks to stir food…