Kickstand Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)
In 2016, The Plough Hotel in North Canterbury, New Zealand banned Lycra-clad customers in an attempt to remove any “unsightly bumps and bulges.” The hotel owner declared Lycra “unsuitable,” explaining “We get a nice group of customers out here, some elderly folk. When you’re trying to concentrate on your breakfast you just want to see the sausages on your plate.” Then as if expecting a confrontation from the lumpy, bumpy bikers, he issued a challenge: “If there’s hordes of cyclists outside threatening to bash us with their bike pumps we can always barricade ourselves in, we’ve got a bit of food and drink here so we should be able to outlast them.” Lycra bike wear may not be de rigueur at Albuquerque’s Kickstand Cafe, but you just might feel overdressed if you didn’t squeeze into the form-fitting attire for a visit to the Alameda cafe. And surprise, surprise, “elderly folk” whom the prudish New Zealand hotel owner tried to shield from “sausages” and other shapes and contours that leave little to the imagination were well represented among the guests wearing second-skin-apparel. It didn’t appear any guests perceived bike shorts to be ribald regalia. Nor did we notice any ogling or lusty…