No Competition Supercharged Bistro – Corrales, New Mexico

In the 1978 movie Same Time Next Year, Ellen Burstyn’s character lamented that her husband considered his years in the Army the best years of his life. When Alan Alda’s character, her partner in a 26-year adulterous affair, commiserated that many men felt that way about their time in the military, Burstyn retorted, “but he spent two years as a prisoner of war.”   I can’t relate to being a prisoner of war, but can fully appreciate why so many men cherish their time in the military.  More than playing sports in high school, the military develops a camaraderie and esprit de corps  you will never experience anywhere else.  Even Hawkeye Pierce, they cynical anti-military doctor who served in Korea with the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital (MASH) recognized “I’m “closer to these people than i’ve ever been to anybody else in my life, or ever expect to be.” When some of us return to civilian life, memories are mostly all that is left of the close relationships we cultivated during our terms of service.  We tend to lose touch with the brotherhood of friends and colleagues for whom we would have happily taken a bullet.  That’s not always the case, however. …

Heidi’s Jam Factory – Albuquerque, New Mexico

How many of us have dreamt about a churning chocolate waterfall; a meadow full of candy;  a candy (Everlasting Gobstopper) that not only changes colors and flavors when sucked on, but also never gets any smaller or disappears; or a carbonated beverage (Fizzy Lifters) that give you flight?  Such were the dreams of children of all ages after the 1971 release of Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory a movie that is more popular in syndication than it was after its release.  Albuquerque has its own version of a magical place where dreams are actually fulfilled.  It’s called Heidi’s Jam Factory. To New Mexicans, the terms “Heidi” and “jam” are inextricably tied.  Heidi’s Raspberry Farm in the village of Corrales has been producing incomparably fresh and wonderful jams since 2000.  The raspberries from which those jams are made are USDA Certified Organic, using a limited amount of sugar to let the berries speak for themselves.  Raspberry jams are ameliorated with such additional organic ingredients as crushed red chile, fresh ginger and dried culinary lavender.  In recent years, Heidi’s has also expanded beyond raspberries, adding strawberry jam, wild blueberry jam and apricot jam to a wonderful repertoire.  All of these jams…

Hannah & Nate’s – Albuquerque & Corrales, New Mexico

There are just some restaurants at which the stereotypical Ralph Cramden hungry man shouldn’t dine. Hannah & Nate’s might be one of them. It’s not that the food isn’t good. That’s certainly not the case. The troglodytic nature of men is such that we whine and complain when we have to wait more than two minutes for our meals and we become doubly obnoxious when the portions aren’t large enough to feed a small bull elephant. Thankfully, my Kim has been a great civilizing influence on me and I’m able to enjoy restaurants such as Hannah & Nate’s as much as she does. 17 May 2019: Hannah & Nate’s is a home decor and market cafe ideally suited for gentrified ladies with a lot of leisure time on their hands. It’s not a restaurant at which a boorish lout will sit patiently then be satisfied with what he would consider “finger foods.” Take for example the “beef & bleu” sandwich featuring sliced roast beef, caramelized onion and sautéed mushrooms topped with bleu cheese on grilled sourdough. It’s not four inches thick the way such men would want it and the bleu cheese isn’t powerful enough to give us the belch…

Belle’s Urban Deli – Corrales, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Father Mark Schultz, the charismatic former priest at the Holy Ghost Parish in Albuquerque used to joke that the reason Catholics are required to abstain from eating meat on Fridays is not because there’s a shortage of cows. That’s certainly true. There is more beef on the hoof grazing on the Land of Enchantment’s green (and mostly brown) grass than there are tax-paying citizens.  That’s why it’s always puzzled me that sandwich restaurants in New Mexico are so chintzy with their meat portions. You’d think there really was a beef shortage (and a surfeit of bread and lettuce) considering many an Albuquerque restaurant sandwich is comprised of thin shards of meat buried under half a head of lettuce and enough bread to choke a mule. Americans are obsessed with size, er…sandwich size.  We’ve come to believe that small sandwiches are un-American!  That it’s practically a mortal sin to construct, serve or eat a small sandwich.  Perhaps that train of  thinking might be attributable to a comic strip called Blondie which has entertaining Americans since 1930.  Blondie’s husband Dagwood was renowned for raiding the leftovers in the refrigerator to construct titanic, multilayered, cartoonishly exaggerated sandwiches. Those sandwiches were replete with sausage,…

Mulas – Corrales, New Mexico

How many times have you heard an elected official referred to as a “jackass?”  In the village of Corrales, that term could conceivably not be used as a pejorative.  Every year during the last weekend of the Corrales Harvest Festival, a pet mayor is named.  If the newly elected mayor is unable to fulfill his or her duties, a pet mayor pro tem is named to assume the duties of the mayoral office.  Corrales has long prided itself on being a paragon of democratic values and inclusivity though the winning candidate is usually a dog or a horse.  In 2022, the winning candidate was a peacock and in 2020, it was  Chip, a five month old miniature donkey. Unlike human elections in which the legitimacy of campaign fund sources (and how those funds are used) is often in question, pet mayor elections are based on a tally of dollar-ballots cast for each.   Votes are one dollar each with ballot boxes available throughout the village.  Nor will you find candidates bad-mouthing one another or railing against fake media coverage.  Campaign slogans tend to be more friendly, too. In 2021, for example, Jewel, a Standard Poodle’s slogan was “The world needs…

Indigo Crow Cafe – Corrales, New Mexico

Now I lay myself down to sleep I pray oh lord my soul to keep Cause if I should die before I wake I hope up in Heaven they’ve got lobster and steak It’s a sin if Heaven ain’t got an Indigo Crow Best food down here up there they’ve gotta know. A Sin if Heaven ain’t got an Indigo Crow But if they don’t then why the hell should I go. Now I’ve tried every joint around here I’ve had green chile stew, I’ve had had my root beer But when I want to treat my taste buds right I know this place is drop-dead tight It’s a sin if Heaven ain’t got an Indigo Crow Best food down here up there they gotta know. – Oscar Butler What would possess troubadour Oscar Butler to rhapsodize in his inimitable melodious timbre about a charming rural retreat in Corrales, New Mexico which serves some of the very best food in the metropolitan Duke City area?  A native New Yorker now living in Albuquerque, Butler sums it up in four words, “Great food, great atmosphere!” There’s a lot to love about the Indigo Crow and it starts with ambiance (atmosphere, if…