Category: Seafood

AlbuquerqueNew MexicoRating: GoodSeafood

Crackin’ Crab Seafood Boil – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno9:13 PM

There are certain notions people find too implausible or preposterous to believe. Case in point: during a recent lunch with my friend Bill Resnik, our waitress asked what we did for a living. Bill told her I was an actor, a premise our waitress found entirely credible—even to the point of recalling she may have seen me in an episode of Breaking Bad. When, however, I told her Bill was a porn star, she couldn’t contain her laughter. She practically fell over in hysteria at the image of my towering (6’5″) friend performing in a porno as if it was the most hilarious thing she’d ever heard. After she composed herself, she told me I was full of sh… er, excrement. My response: “full of sh..” was Bill’s porn name when he starred in diaper fetish movies. We thought we’d have to hose her down when even more raucous fits of laughter ensued. Another notion New Mexicans find implausible is the idea that very good to excellent seafood can be found within the landlocked borders of the Land of Enchantment. Since the rapid fire succession closure in the early 2000s of Cafe Oceana, the Rio Grande Yacht Club and Seagull…

CaliforniaRating: N/R (Not Rated)SeafoodUnited States

Schooners Coastal Kitchen & Bar – Monterey, California

Gil Garduno8:20 AM

Cannery Row in Monterey in California is a poem, a stink, a grating noise, a quality of light, a tone, a habit, a nostalgia, a dream.” ~John Steinbeck Cannery Row, 1945 During basic military training in the Air Force, several of us who could speak multiple languages were asked to take the Defense Language Aptitude Battery (DLAB), the test the military services use to measure aptitude to learn a foreign language.  Fewer than five percent of people who take (or retake) the DLAB pass it.  Somehow I managed a high score and was extended an opportunity to attend the Defense Language Institute Foreign Language Center at the Presidio of Monterey.   My response, one borne of ignorance and stupidity, was “I don’t want to go to Mexico.”  It had not dawned on me that the Monterey being offered was in California.  Over the years, I’ve revisited my decision frequently.  On one hand, the Air Force might have decided to have me learn Arabic or Iranian then stationed me on a remote mountaintop to listen to and decipher chatter.  On the other, the year or so spent in Monterey would have been glorious (other than the hours of poring over language tapes…

NevadaRating: N/R (Not Rated)SeafoodUnited States

Joe’s Seafood, Prime Steak and Stone Crab – Las Vegas, Nevada

Gil Garduno11:04 AM

“Stone crab is probably what God eats every night of the year, but in Florida we mortals only have it from mid-October to mid-May…” Curiosity Killed the Cat Sitter by Blaize Clement Whether or not stone crab is really what God likes for dinner might make an interesting literary debate, but there’s no disputing that ordinary and not-so-mere mortals have loved the captivating crustaceans of citrus country for nearly a century.  In 1913 Joe Weiss discovered that stone crabs were not only edible, they were delicious–so much so that his small lunch counter in then backwater Miami Beach became an epicurean epicenter.  High society–everyone from Will Rogers, Gloria Swanson and Emelia Earhart to the Duke and Duchess of Windsor and J. Edgar Hoover–flocked– to his restaurant.  So did a nemesis of Hoover’s Federal Bureau of Investigation.  Using the alias Al Brown, public enemy number one Al Capone and his entourage dined at Joe’s every evening.  Capone liked and respected Joe’s wife so much (and ostensibly her preparation of stone crabs) that every Mother’s Day, he sent a truck to the restaurant to deliver a horseshoe-shaped bouquet of flowers which read, “Good Luck Mother Joe’s.”  Jennie Weiss never realized who he…

AlbuquerqueClosed in 2013Gone But Not ForgottenSeafood

Desert Fish – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno8:31 PM

If you were entertaining a visitor from Seattle or Portland, would you take them to Long John Silver’s, Captain D’s or even  Pelican’s to show them how the seafood in land-locked Albuquerque measures up to the seafood in those two bastions of fresh, succulent seafood?  Not likely!  You’d probably want to take them to a restaurant which showcases New Mexico’s red and green chile.  For some reason, however, during business trips to Seattle and Portland, my well-intentioned colleagues insist on taking me to Mexican restaurants.  Perhaps they assume that with my Spanish surname and place of residence, I would want to try their Mexican food.  That makes as much sense as expecting me to stay at La Quinta and drive a Ford Fiesta rental car. As a consequence of such faulty (albeit well-meaning) assumptions, I’ve been subjected to such chains as Chevy’s and other restaurants of that ilk where instead of “red or green,” a gloppy brown “sauce” absolutely reeking of the accursed demon spice cumin is ladled on liberally over the overly cheesy entrees.  Perhaps discerning my disdain for chains, my colleagues have also entertained me at such independent, but no less offensive Americanized Mexican restaurants as Macheezmo Mouse (you read…

AlbuquerqueSeafood

Pelican’s Restaurant – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno2:07 AM

The remonstrance from a group of my foodie friends was vocal and animated when I contended that good seafood in the Duke City dining establishments not only exists, some of it borders on greatness.  One ardent detractor asserted that good seafood in our landlocked community is as rare as a good steak was on Gilligan’s Island.  Another argued that only at Pappadeaux, a national chain, could good seafood be found while a third reminisced that in the 1990s there were actually three restaurants–Cafe Oceana, the Rio Grande Yacht Club and Pelican’s–vying perennially for “best seafood” honors. My rejoinder was to remind them of the half-dozen or so mariscos (Mexican seafood) restaurants in the Duke City, most of which serve very good to excellent seafood.  “Duplicity,” they cried, “when we think of seafood, we’re thinking of King crab, Ahi tuna, lobster and halibut.”  I then reminded them that Pelican’s continues to thrive in two Duke City locations–the original on the Heights (9800 Montgomery, N.E.) and a newer location on the burgeoning Northwest side (10022 Coors, N.W.).  They unanimously found merit in the case for Pelican’s, a popular seafood emporium that has served Albuquerque since 1975. That’s more than three and a…

MaineRating: N/R (Not Rated)SeafoodUnited States

Mabel’s Lobster Claw Restaurant – Kennebunkport, Maine

Gil Garduno9:06 PM

What comes to mind when you think of lobster?  A rare treat or special event meal?   A delicacy?  Would you believe some cultures still consider lobster “the cockroach of the sea?”  There’s a scientific basis for that.  Neither fish nor mammal, lobsters are arthropods, closely related to the lowly insect.  Like the insect, lobsters belong to the invertebrate (lacking a backbone or spinal column) family. Today you have to pay dearly for an excellent lobster meal, but that hasn’t always been the case.  Lobsters were once so abundant that Native Peoples used them as fish bait and fertilizer.  According to early Colonists in the Plymouth, Massachusetts area, lobsters sometimes washed up on the beaches in piles two feet high.  It was hard to get gustatorily excited about something so common.  It’s conceivable that lobsters of exaggerated proportions may not only have been frightening, but tough to eat considering they supposedly grew to forty pounds or more. As such, in Colonial New England, they were considered poverty food and were served to servants, slaves, children and prisoners.  Children bringing lobster sandwiches to school were considered the poor kids (similar to the children who came to school with tortilla sandwiches instead of…

MaineRating: N/R (Not Rated)SeafoodUnited States

The Clam Shack – Kennebunkport, Maine

Gil Garduno8:45 PM

The late George Plimpton was a pioneering journalist who garnered much of his acclaim from competing in professional sporting events then recording the experience from an amateur’s standpoint.  From pitching against the National League prior to an All-Star baseball game to quarterbacking the Detroit Lions in an intrasquad scrimmage, Plimpton momentarily lived the dream of every would-be professional athlete. Today, it seems every network and cable channel has a competing reality show in which an unabashed combatant or group of contestants undertake unsavory jobs–such as bullfighter or oil driller–for which they are wholly unqualified.  The Discovery channel even has a show in which a poor sap “exposes the grimy underbelly of America’s dirtiest jobs.”  Participants in these reality shows run the gamut–from risking life and limb to almost certain humiliation. It came as no surprise when the Food Network announced its 2009 launch of its own job related reality show.  On “Will Work for Food” host Adam Gertler travels across the fruited plain trying out different jobs in the food industry for a day.  The show calls for him to do literally learn every job in the world of food.  The good-natured Gertler has had jobs in which he’s had…

Diners Drive-Ins and DivesMaineRating: N/R (Not Rated)SeafoodUnited States

Maine Diner – Wells, Maine

Gil Garduno9:38 PM

How do you know when a restaurant has really made it?  Is it when that restaurant is recognized by national publications as one of the very best diners in the country?  Or when celebrities go out of their way to dine at its tables?  Is it when more than five-million people have been warmly welcomed at its doors?  When neither rain, nor sleet nor the most stern and frigid of Maine winters can dissuade visitors? The Maine Diner has achieved all of this and so much more.  Richly deserving of all the accolades bestowed upon it, the telltale sign that it’s made it–at least from a pop culture perspective–is when it’s recognized as the restaurant after which Flo’s Offshore Diner is patterned.  If you’ve never heard of Flo’s Offshore Diner, it might be because the Albuquerque Journal isn’t one of the 700 newspapers across America in which Non Sequitur is syndicated. Non Sequitur is simply one of the most creative and honored comic strips in syndication today, winner of four National Cartoonists Society divisional awards, the most prestigious accolade in cartooning.  It is creator Wiley Miller’s vehicle for sharing his wry observations about the absurdities of everyday life.  There are…

MassachusettsRating: N/R (Not Rated)Seafood

Woodman’s of Essex – Essex, Massachusetts

Gil Garduno9:34 PM

If you can imagine what New Mexico would be like without green chile or the South without barbecue, you can understand what New England would be without fried clams.  Like our beloved green chile, fried clams are an iconic food, so much so that they are almost synonymous with states like Maine and Massachusetts in which they are harvested and sold.  It’s almost a wonder the license plate mottos in at least one of those two states isn’t “The Fried Clam State.” As with our cherished chile, fried clams have a distinctive, unforgettable flavor that not everybody “gets.”  Similar to chile, those who love fried clams are usually ensnared at first bite by this distinctly delicious delicacy.  Like green chile, they are positively addictive and have a flavor that once enjoyed imprints itself indelibly upon your taste buds and your memories. There is some dispute as to the progenitor of fried clams.  They were on the menu at Boston’s hallowed Parker House in 1865 though there is no indication if they were deep-fried or batter-dipped.  The Parker House is already credited with having invented Boston Cream Pie and Parker House Rolls, so posterity doesn’t seem to mind that someone else…

MassachusettsRating: N/R (Not Rated)Seafood

Union Oyster House – Boston, Massachusetts

Gil Garduno9:50 PM

The Union Oyster House, in continuous operation since 1826, is not only the oldest restaurant in Boston, it’s the oldest restaurant in continuous service in America.  In fact, it’s housed in a building which predates the American Revolution.  Union Street in which it is situated was laid out in 1626 and while there are no municipal records documenting the Oyster House’s construction, there is more than anecdotal evidence that it was built as early as the 1710s. A major landmark for more than a quarter millennium, the Union Oyster House is not officially one of the sixteen nationally significant historic sites that comprise the Freedom Trail, a 2.5 mile red-brick walking trail that leads you through treasured American landmarks.  Still many regard it on nearly equal stature as the unique collection of museums, churches, meeting houses, burying grounds, a ship and historic markets that recount the story of the American Revolution and which comprise the Freedom Trail.  In fact, no excursion along the Freedom Trail would be complete without a slight detour to the Union Oyster House. Originally named the “Atwood and Bacon Oyster House” after its founding owners, it was launched when an oyster obsession swept across the colonies.…

Closed in 2012Gone But Not ForgottenMassachusettsSeafood

Kingfish Hall – Boston, Massachusetts (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno7:57 PM

“Endorse what you love.”  That’s the message NASCAR driver Tony Stewart delivers to Eric Estrada, Carrot Top and a host of other candidates the stature of which usually grace Dancing With The Stars and other dreadful reality shows.  If the television commercial is to be believed, what Stewart loves is Burger King, the fast food sponsor who supplanted Subway on the hood of his car and which is now paying for Stewart’s love. What it seems celebrities, including celebrity chefs, love most is having their names and smiling countenances visible to the general public and getting paid wheelbarrow’s full of money for the privilege.  Do you really believe Food Network glitterati Guy Fieri loves TGI Fridays or that Applebee’s can really execute Tyler Florence’s recipes?  Television commercials would have you believe that (then they’d also have you believe the myth about honest politicians, too). Some celebrity chefs not only “sell out” to the corporate cabal, they leave the chef work to someone else (an underpaid “executive” chef) and begin to proliferate the myth that is them by becoming restaurant impresarios.  It doesn’t take long before the celebrity chef’s name adorns the marquee of several restaurants, sometimes in several cities.  Sure…