La Sirenita – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Our friends, John Martin and Lynn Garner and I couldn’t help but laugh. There before our very eyes was the depiction of a meme come to life. In the dining room of la Sirenita was a papier Mâché reproduction of the bottom half of a mermaid. It reminded us of a meme we recently shared.  That meme depicted a grizzled sailor marooned on a desert island.  On the first panel of the meme the sailor smiled lasciviously as a beautiful and buxom mermaid approached the island.  The second panel shows the sailor cooking the bottom half of the mermaid on a rotisserie.  Yeah, it’s gruesome, but come on, it’s funny, too. The bottom half of a mermaid wasn’t the only unique art on La Sirenita’s walls.  One framed painting depicted a rather disfigured Marilyn Monroe.  Another portrayed a black woman in the throes of a foodgasm.  More conspicuous than the artwork was the absence of other diners.  While the bar was packed, the only other diners in the capacious dining room were two eight-year old brothers, one of whom innocently asked if The Dude was a poodle.  Though our debonair dachshund was insulted (rightfully so), he has too much class…

Big Nate’s Family BBQ – Mesa, Arizona

“The Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man” ~Genesis 2:21-22 Ever since God took a rib from Adam and created Eve with it, Adam and Eve’s male desccendents have been craving ribs almost as if wanting to replace the one God took. Whether short ribs, baby back ribs, spare ribs, St. Louis style ribs, or any other type of of rib, the scions of the first couple have a rapacious appetite for ribs, the meatier the better.  NOTE:  Because both men and women have the same number of ribs (24: 12 on each side of the rib cage) God must have replaced the missing rib on Adam and Eve’s progeny. One of the most prolific paramours of ribs is my friend Bruce “Sr. Plata” Silver.  Together we’ve journeyed far and wide in search of Korean style beef short ribs and beef ribs, his two favorite types of beef ribs.  When he and…

Blu Pig BBQ & Blues – Moab, Utah

For many of us barbecue is a noun as in “a social gathering at which barbecued food is eaten.”   For others it’s a verb (to roast or smoke food over wood using smoke at low temperatures over a long cooking time).  For the most passionate and devoted, barbecue is a way of life…even a religion.  That religion is practiced by large and small congregations in both outdoor and indoor temples throughout a portion of U.S. Highway 61.  The hymns wailed and warbled by choruses of angelic voices are the reason that portion of U.S. Highway 61 is known as the “Blues Highway.”  Rivaling Route 66 as the most famous road in American music lore, the portion of U.S. Highway 61 known as the legendary “Blues Highway” runs north from Vicksburg, Mississippi to Memphis, Tennessee.  So common is the paring of barbecue and blues along this stretch that U.S. Highway 61 could rightfully be called the “Barbecue and Blues Highway.”  Visit the iconic Beale Street in the heart of Memphis and you’ll understand why Bon Appetit declared “Blues and barbecue, smoke and sauce. In Memphis, they all meld beautifully. Just like heaven.” We didn’t wear blue suede shoes during our visit…

Sparky’s Burgers, Barbecue & Espresso – Hatch, New Mexico

New Mexico’s Green Chile Cheeseburger Trail not only celebrates one of the Land of Enchantment’s most iconic foods, it showcases the restaurants, drive-ins, diners, dives, joints, cafes, roadside stands and bowling alleys which prepare our ubiquitous, incomparable green chile cheeseburger.  To New Mexicans, there is nothing as thoroughly soul-satisfying and utterly delicious! What elevates a burger from the ordinary to the extraordinary is taste bud awakening, tongue tingling, olfactory arousing green chile, New Mexico’s official state vegetable (even though it’s technically a fruit).  In the continually evolving mosaic that describes New Mexico’s cultural intermingling, one constant is green chile, an essential ingredient in many of our recipes and THE centerpiece of any outstanding green chile cheeseburger.  Even such corporate megaliths as McDonald’s and Sonic try their hand at the green chile cheeseburger. It stands to reason that one of, if not THE very best green chile cheeseburger in the Land of Enchantment would be served in Hatch, the undisputed epicenter of New Mexico’s chile production.  Widely regarded as the “chile capital of the world,” the village’s population of around 1,200 citizens increases by twenty times as people from all over the world converge for its annual chile festival.  It’s a…

Rev’s BBQ – Albuquerque, New Mexico

You might think that the food truck industry is an ultra-competitive dog-eat-dog business in which purveyors aren’t very gracious when discussing fellow food truck operators. Considering how they often jockey for a limited number of spaces in heavily trafficked events and vie for consumer attention and dollars, you would think they’d denigrate their brethren.  In an October 4th interview on the fabulous What’s Up Abq Podcast, Michael “Mighty Mike” Mondragon dispelled that notion.  Mike couldn’t have been more benignant about Albuquerque’s food truck scene, calling it a “community.”   He expressed tremendous admiration for both the owners and the food of Tikka Spice and Wing It Up (review pending), among others. When asked “if you’re not eating your own barbecue, where do you go in town,”  Mike waxed poetic about his friend Manuel “Rev” Duran.  Mike appreciated that Manuel, who “who just started doing his trailer part-time because he’s a postal worker”…”has some real good barbecue” and “does it for the love.”  Ironically, just a few days prior to listening to that interview, my friend Bill Resnik had raved to me about Rev’s brisket, calling it “the best I’ve ever had.”  Over the years Bill and I have shared barbecue in Phoenix,…

Little Miss BBQ – Phoenix, Arizona

If you grew up in New Mexico, you’ve likely heard some variation of that tired old epigram “The reason New Mexico is so windy is because it’s bordered by Arizona which sucks and Texas which blows.”   If any truth whatsoever can be ascribed to that witticism, New Mexico should have fabulous barbecue because it’s bordered by Arizona which has great barbecue and Texas which has the best barbecue in the universe.  Alas, virtually every barbecue aficionado I know agrees that the Land of Enchantment’s barbecue has a lot to be desired.  It’s “good” most will agree, “better than it used to be,” others will tell you.  Still many of them will tell you the only barbecue restaurant in New Mexico worth a lengthy  pilgrimage is Mad Jack’s Mountaintop Barbecue which has its genesis in Lockhart, Texas, the barbecue capital of the world.  For better than good barbecue, savvy barbecue fanatics make a run for the border–either to Arizona or to Texas. Mastering the precise science and culinary art of the low-and-slow process of smoking of meats is not for the faint of heart or for couch potatoes like me.  It requires the patience of Job, the persistence of Hercules and…

Black Mesa BBQ – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

“Barbecue may be our nation’s most democratic food. (Think small d-democratic, as in of the people, by the people, for the people.) That’s part of the problem: Egalitarian foods with elemental appeal oftentimes get short shrift.” ~John T. Edge for Gourmet Magazine When we first heard about a restaurant in Albuquerque’s South Valley offering “Texas style barbecue in the Land of Enchantment,” three questions came to mind.  First, of course, was “could this really be Texas style barbecue?”  “Texas is like a whole other country” in which there is no one style of barbecue.  Instead, barbecue varies from one region to another across the Lone Star State.  Pundits who refer to “Texas style barbecue” are usually talking about Central Texas barbecue hailing from the hill country region around Austin.  My second question was “why would an Albuquerque restaurant call itself “Black Mesa.”  New Mexico’s most famous Black Mesa is the sacred mountain within the confines of the San Ildelfonso Pueblo just north of Española.  It’s about 80 miles from the Duke City. My third question and maybe the easiest to answer was “why would someone open a barbecue restaurant here.”  “Here” is Coors Blvd. just about as far south as…

Nomad’s BBQ – Albuquerque, New Mexico

As a spindly teenager who hadn’t yet metamorphosed into my (then) scrawny 6’1″ stature, I had grand delusions of someday playing basketball for the University of New Mexico (UNM) Lobos.  There could be no greater aspiration for a twelve-year old from the mountains than to wear the cherry, silver and turquoise and play for UNM Coach Norm Ellenberger.  Back then Coach Ellenberger could do no wrong in my eyes…or in the eyes of every Lobo fan.  A 1974 Sports Illustrated article described him as “the Newman-Redford among coaches, a man of such striking looks and charisma that his picture, hanging in Albuquerque restaurants, must be guarded lest it be defaced with scribbled I love hims.” When my Uncle Fred introduced me to the legendary coach,  I brazenly told him I’d someday play for the Lobos (obviously that didn’t pan out).  I was so starstruck when Coach Ellenberger shook my hand and spoke with me that it’s a wonder I didn’t tell him that I’d never wash that hand again.  That’s just not something aspiring Lobo basketball players do.  Over the years I’ve met and befriended many people I’ve admired and respected, but have never uttered the platitudinous phrase “I may…

Mighty Mike’s Meats – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Thank you, Mighty Mike! Thank you for restoring our faith in barbecue just one day after my Kim declared “I don’t want to have barbecue for a long time.”  Readers might find it hard to believe, but we uncovered a barbecue restaurant so bad our one visit risked turning us both off barbecue completely (and no, I won’t be reviewing it because if you can’t say anything nice…).  If our lifelong love for barbecue was to be restored, it was really important that our next barbecue experience be absolutely amazing and that it happen quickly (like getting back on the proverbial horse that bucked us off). The very next day, I decided to take my Kim to a food truck whose reputation for stellar smoked meats precedes it.  Thank you, Mighty Mike for living up to the expectations and hype.  Make that thank you for exceeding the expectations and hype! I hate to think that because of one horrendous experience, we might have deprived ourselves of barbecue for a long time, that we might not have experienced what may well be the best barbecue we’ve ever had in Albuquerque.  Thank you, Mighty Mike. Legendary raconteur and television personality Anthony Bourdain…

Watson’s BBQ – Tucumcari, New Mexico

The Wikipedia article on Eastern New Mexico describes the region as “mostly characterized by flat featureless terrain,” even likening it to West Texas: “Like much of the Llano Estacado region, Eastern New Mexico is largely agricultural and resembles West Texas in geography, culture, economy, and demographics.”  While Eastern New Mexico may not be back-dropped by spectacular mountain ranges or bisected by the murky Rio Grande, it’s got an enchantment all its own even if the Wikipedia writer can’t see it.  It’s also got something else the Rio Grande Corridor, for all its population centers and cultural diversity, can’t match.  It’s got long-standing barbecue traditions that, not surprisingly, have their roots in Texas.  By comparison, barbecue along the Rio Grande Corridor is a fledgling chick learning to fly.  Eastern New Mexico is home to Smokin’ On the Pecos, the New Mexico State Barbecue championship held every year in Artesia.  The winner of this prestigious event–sanctioned by the Kansas City Barbecue Society–is an automatic preferred qualifier for the world barbecue championship.  Artesia is the middle jewel in a three city diadem that includes Roswell to its north and Carlsbad to its south.   These three cities constitute New Mexico’s  “Barbecue Belt.”  Drive…

S-A Barbecue – Albuquerque, New Mexico

London-based restaurant critic Jay Rayner makes barbecue sound a bit like a scientific process: “the long, virtuous interplay of fire, smoke and time on cow and pig muscle fibre; who sees only joyous caramelisation and the deep flavours gifted by the Maillard reaction, when heat says hello to amino acids and natural sugars and they all get along famously.”  He’s actually quite right, but most of us got enough chemistry formulas in high school.   We recognize that at its most basic, the formula for barbecue is expressed much more simply: meat plus smoke plus time plus (or minus) sauce equals delicious bliss. Okay, my formula only sounds simple.  Mastering the art and science of “low and slow” actually takes a long time and extensive practice, often fraught with trial and error at the expense of ruined meats.  Speaking from personal experience, not all of us have the patience or aptitude to smoke meats people actually want to eat much less to become pit masters.  It’s a true trial by fire that shouldn’t be undertaken by the faint of heart or devoid of talent.  Survey the Duke City barbecue scene and you might conclude that baptisms by fire and smoke…