Joe’s Farm Grill – Gilbert, Arizona

When primitive men, women and asgender people crossed the Bering Straits to escape global freezing, they eventually made their way to the Phoenix area.  Ever since, their progeny has been trying to figure out how to escape global scorching which transpires on most summer days (seven or eight months a year).  They built Biosphere 2, the world’s largest controlled environment.  They built a swimming pool in Chase Field, home of the Arizona Diamondbacks.  When compelled to leave the air conditioned confines of their homes, Phoenicians risk third-degree burns from their car doors and  flee to their summer homes in Prescott and Heber where instead of 130, the temperature is only 99. They also join hordes of tourists in a utopian…

Alter Ego – Tempe, Arizona

Ever since my wonderful 94-year young mom was no longer able to prepare and host lavish Christmas Day dinners at her home, my Kim and I have been “snowbirding” it with annual trips to the Valley of The Sun.  Every year I try to surprise my Kim with a better than the previous year’s Christmas dinner at some fancy schmantzy restaurant.  Last year it was at the magnificent Zinc Bistro in Scottsdale.  The previous year, we dined at Roy’s Restaurant, also in Scottsdale.  Our inaugural Christmas dinner in the Phoenix area was at the Fat Ox, a  James Beard nominated restaurant in Scottsdale.  All served us fabulous (albeit very expensive) meals. My criteria for selecting a restaurant includes, of course,…

Big Nate’s Family BBQ – Mesa, Arizona

“The Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man” ~Genesis 2:21-22 Ever since God took a rib from Adam and created Eve with it, Adam and Eve’s male desccendents have been craving ribs almost as if wanting to replace the one God took. Whether short ribs, baby back ribs, spare ribs, St. Louis style ribs, or any other type of of rib, the scions of the first couple have a rapacious appetite for…

The Chuck Box – Tempe, Arizona

“I’ll have the great big one,” the barrel-chested behemoth behind me chortled.  One of his companions, a bookish nerd followed up with “I’ll have the big one.”  Not to be outdone, several male Arizona State University (ASU) students took turns ordering either the “great big one” or the “big one.”  Each order was followed by raucous laughter as if they were the first students ever to place their orders for burgers named for their respective sizes (the burgers, not the students’ manhood).  Not one of them dared ask for “the little one” for fear of being humiliated or even ostracized by their fellows.  “What a brilliant marketing strategy!,” I thought as I, too, ordered a “great big one” even though…

Cocina Chiwas – Tempe, Arizona

Chef Armando Hernandez is my new hero.  In an interview with the Phoenix New Times, he was asked about “authentic Mexican cuisine.”  His retort was scathingly brilliant: “It’s very difficult for me to have these conversations, especially among our own people, about what’s considered authentic.  “They’ll be like, ‘Well, my Grandma-’ and I’m like, yeah, I’m not your Grandma though.”  Those of us who grew up in the Land of Enchantment when our distinctive cuisine was widely labeled “Mexican” remain somewhat in the dark about differences between New Mexican cuisine and that of our Southern neighbor.   It was only rather recently that cognoscenti determined New Mexican cuisine is different enough from Mexico’s to warrant its own label–New Mexican. Perhaps…

Sugar Jam – Scottsdale, Arizona

I often describe my youth in rural, agrarian Peñasco as “bumpkinly naïveté.”  I may have been book smart (and insolent) enough to intimidate some of my teachers, but insofar as experiential smarts, I was one pretty sheltered guy.  The very first black people I ever saw up close were Drew and Shane Roebuck, gazelle-quick running backs for Menaul High School.   I wanted to kill them…not because they were black, but because I couldn’t catch them.  You see, I had a reputation as a fierce tackler.  It didn’t matter the race, ethnicity, religious affiliation or favorite breakfast cereal, I wanted to tackle everyone in a uniform that didn’t have Peñasco’s blue and gold. In basic military training for the Air…

Grimaldi’s Pizzeria – Scottsdale, Arizona

I don’t often refer to myself as a “restaurant critic” or “restaurant reviewer.” My preferred gloss is “observer and essayer on the culinary condition.”   Yep, that’s a high falutin bit of ego-stroking, but it’s accurate.  One of the things I’ve observed during frequent trips to the Phoenix area–both while employed at Intel and while snowbirding over the Christmas and Festivus holidays–is that middling quality chain restaurants tend to find a home in the Valley of the Sun an year or two before figuring out they would be smash successes in Albuquerque. Another salient obseration is that some pretty highly regarded East Coast and Midwest restaurants and chefs don’t like the cold either…or maybe they’re following the exodus of snowbirds…

Source – Gilbert, Arizona

When Chef Claudio Urciuoli posed for a photograph with Source’s baker Ryan and chef Trevor, he sported a smile.  I joked with him about his stern countenance and he assured me that he really does have a sense of humor.  Despite the dissolution of his partnership at Pa’La, the acclaimed chef has every reason to smile.  He’s once again doing what he wants to do, operating a restaurant whose approach and raison d’etre are encapsulated in this statement from the restaurant’s website:  We are an ingredient driven, community centered, counter service restaurant, wine bar, and retail shop. Chef Urciuoli does indeed have a sense of humor and a personal warmth that really came across during our conversation.  He shared his…

Slate Street Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico

In 2005, Slate Street and an eponymous bistro just north of Lomas became the toast (a garlicky bruschetta) of the town. The Slate Street Cafe opened its doors in July, 2005 in a heretofore lightly trafficked, relatively unknown street north of Lomas. Nestled in the heart of the legal district, the Slate Street Cafe is so, make that Soho cool. Its sleek, modern, high-ceilinged dining room, looming wine bar and capacious patio is frequented by some of Albuquerque’s most hip and beautiful people. It’s a breath of fresh air in a burgeoning downtown district where revitalization doesn’t always appear to be working. The Slate Street Cafe is the braintrust of a proven and very successful pedigree whose bloodline includes founding…

Cake Fetish – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Americans are absolutely food obsessed!  It’s become alarmingly obvious in our culture of caloric overachievers that few of us miss any meals. It’s also telling (yet seemingly innocuous) that many of the terms of endearment we use for one another are related to food.  Terms such as honey, sugar, pumpkin and others are regularly used by sweet-talking lotharios of both genders. One term of endearment which has grown out of fashion is “cupcake” which in today’s vernacular refers to a woman whose front and back body fat hangs over the waistline, giving the woman the “top of the cupcake” look. While “cupcake” may have become an intended compliment which will get your face slapped, cupcakes themselves have been reestablished as…

On The Flip – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Though I pride myself on having a sesquipedalian vocabulary, very often pop culture vernacular escapes me.  Even food memes borne of pop culture are well over my head.  If you’re familiar with or use such terms as “good soup,” “cheugy,” “phone eats first,” “glizzy” and “caviar bump,”  you must be from the Gen Z generation.  Were I to use these terms, it would make me seem like a patronizing old fossil trying to be cool. During a December, 2023 visit to the Tin Can Alley, my Kim and I came a restaurant with a curious name neither of us could comprehend.  We quickly dismissed the notion that “On The Flip” had something to do with Albuquerque drivers extending their middle…