Johnnie’s Hamburgers & Coneys – El Reno, Oklahoma

“In onion is strength; and a garden without it lacks flavour. The onion, in its satin wrappings, is among the most beautiful of vegetables; and it is the only one that represents the essence of things. It can almost be said to have a soul.” ~Charles Dudley Warner, American Novelist In the vividly hued threads that comprise a diverse tapestry of culinary preferences, onions stand as a polarizing ingredient. While some of us hail onions as the backbone of flavor, others recoil at their mere mention. In some cultures, onions are associated with bad breath and are avoided in social settings. This stigma can reinforce negative perceptions, making onions less appealing to those who prioritize etiquette. The fear of “onion…

Eischen’s Bar – Okarche, Oklahoma

Even by Oklahoma small town standards, Okarche is a small town.  It’s not much bigger than a village though too big to be considered a hamlet.   With a population of  1,141 as of the 2020 United States census, Okarche is one of the most interesting spots in a state replete with interesting spots.  For one thing, the name Okarche is a portmanteau derived from parts of three words, Oklahoma (OK), Arapaho (AR), and Cheyenne (CHE).  Okarche is situated in what was part of the Cheyenne-Arapaho Reservation, after the disgraceful Trail of Tears forced relocation of Southeastern tribes.  Though only sixteen miles west of Oklahoma City and fourteen miles north of El Reno (home of Johnnie’s onion burgers), Okarche is as…

The Original Realburger – Santa Fe, New Mexico

Her sunrise could bring light into a blind man. Her sunset could put tears there in his eyes. Her colors are laying there in brush strokes. Underneath those peote skies. The lay of the land stirs all of my emotions. She heals me with a laid back energy. She holds onto my broken lifeless spirit. And molds me just like pottery. And nowhere that I’ve ever been can make me feel this way. That’s why I’m going there to stay. – The Bellamy Brothers Santa Fe’s preternatural beauty is so captivating that even the plethora of writers, artists and musicians who pilgrimage to this jewel of the Southwest are at a loss for adjectives to adequately describe it.  Perhaps because…

Yo Mama’s Grill – Socorro, New Mexico

Such was my bumpkinly naivete that my virgin ears weren’t subjected to a “yo mama” joke until shortly after my 19th birthday. The site was the Non-Commissioned Officer’s (NCO) club at Royal Air Force (RAF) Upper Heyford in England. The event was an irreverent ninety-minute show featuring brazen comedian Redd Foxx whose explicit brand of humor both shocked and thrilled the American-culture-starved audience. Foxx’s repertoire included lampooning nearly every ethnic group in the audience, invective-laden raunchiness that would make a stripper blush and a unique take on virtually every social taboo of the time. It was truly the antithesis of political correctness. Still, it was the “yo mama” jokes that shocked me most. As an unabashed mama’s boy, it rankled…

Laguna Burger – Rio Rancho, New Mexico

For the second year in a row, Livability.com has named Rio Rancho as one of the “top 100 places to live in America.”  The City of Vision ranked 81st with a “LivScore” of 714.  That measure takes into consideration eight broad categories:  Economy, Housing  and Cost of Living, Amenities, Transportation, Environment, Safety, Education, and Health. Santa Fe was the only other city in New Mexico to make the top 100 list, ranking 98th with a LivScore of 694.  In 2023, the City of Vision earned a ranking as the 86th place to live based on the Livability’s quality of life score. Theories abound as to what accounts for the improvement–from 86th to 81st–in Rio Rancho’s ranking.  I’ve got my own…

Loro Asian Smokehouse & Bar – Austin, Texas

An average person spends 52 days of their life standing in line (queueing) and that not just at the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV). The most notorious offenders are, of course, supermarket lines, public transportation, the post office, airports and barbecue joints in the great state of Texas.  Okay, that last one may not be true though it certainly feels that way.  Franklin BBQ in Austin has nothing short of a cult following–and probably the longest lines of any barbecue joint in Texas.  Standing in line is part of the Franklin BBQ experience.  Online sites advise that “wait times during the week at Franklin Barbecue are typically 2-3 hours and on weekends closer to 4 or 5 hours.”  Smoked meat…

La Barbecue – Austin, Texas

Every summer, a predictable ritual takes place. After hibernating comfortably since the previous autumn, men attired in aprons emblazoned with the slogan “kiss the cook” will selflessly volunteer to “cook” a meal. This, of course, means grilling, a decidedly masculine affectation and the only type of cooking most men can be entrusted to do. When this ritual is completed and guests are sated, lavish praise and thanks are heaped upon the “chef.” In truth, the only aspects of this ritual for which men are typically responsible is getting the grill lit, placing the meats on the grill and turning them (after our female better halves warn us that the meats are burning). Normally all the preparatory work—buying the food; preparing…

JewBoy Burgers – Austin, Texas

With hordes of eager eaters forming lines around select restaurants–if not the block–you’d think those diners were gum-snapping Swifties clamoring to enter the venue of a Taylor Swift concert  That’s the case not only in barbecue joints anointed with Michelin star and James Beard Foundation honors, not to mention restaurants featured on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives.  Queues for ‘cue, lines for lasagna, cavalcades for calamari…that’s pretty much the way it is at all the time in Austin.  It is a foodie city after my own heart.  I loathe lines so much, I’d rather arrive half an hour early than to stand in a line for more than ten minutes. Alas, on a day in which drizzle spritzed city streets, I…

LeRoy And Lewis Barbecue – Austin, Texas

What can you say about a wife who practically pushes her husband out the door so he can gallavant through the Lone Star State in pursuit of barbecue?  That’s precisely what my Kim did.  She didn’t do so out of malice or because she’s tired of me.  Far from it.  We’ve been together for four decades.  There’s no one whose company I enjoy more and it’s mutual.  Throughout my Air Force career, we were stationed far away from family and had only ourselves to rely on.  We’ve grown together both figuratively and literally (mostly me).  While I would love for my Kim to be by my side every moment of every day, she knows I sometimes need to explore culinary…

InterStellar BBQ – Austin, Texas

With more than 2,500 purveyors of bodacious barbecue in the Lone Star State, Texas Monthly Magazine has increased the likelihood of smoked meat aficionados locating and enjoying the very best.  That’s largely because of Daniel Vaughn, the magazine’s “Barbecue Editor.”  Vaughn has traveled the world sampling smoked meats at over 1,800 barbecue joints, most of which are in Texas.  Texans making pilgrimages in pursuit of barbecue carry with them Vaughn’s tome The Prophets of Smoked Meat: A Journey Through Texas Barbecue.  They also take along Texas Monthly’s “The 50 Best Texas Barbecue Joints.” Vaughn’s Texas Monthly compilation, last published in 2021, will be updated in 2025.  These are the barbecue bibles to which believers are called. There’s only two jobs I’ve…

The Sandwich Company – Albuquerque, NE

In 1967, John Poppy introduced the term “generation gap” in Look magazine.  Still used widely, the term refers to the “the chasm that separates the beliefs and behaviors belonging to members of different generations. This gap often manifests in varying thoughts, actions, and preferences between younger and older generations.”  According to Investopedia, “Differences may exist in politics, values, pop culture, and other areas.”  Among the ways in which a generation gap exists is in culinary exploration. TouchBistro, “an all-in-one point of sale and restaurant management system that makes running a restaurant easier” conducted a survey of more than 2,600 diners which revealed a wide expanse between generations when it comes to dining out.  TouchBistro discovered that younger generations–“56% of Gen…