Kaufman’s Coffee & Bagels – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Seinfeld: “What is that smell?” Kramer “That’s East River.” Seinfeld: You’re swimming in the East River? The most heavily trafficked, overly contaminated waterway on the eastern seaboard?” Kramer: Technically Norfolk has more gross tonnage.” When I lived in the Boston area for two years immediately following high school, those of us in the Bay State (even temporary residents) refused to acknowledge New York City was better than Boston at anything.  We were devastated when the hated Yankees bested our beloved Red Sox in the 1978 American League East tie-breaker.  For that we’ll never forgive Bucky Dent.  Before my first visit to the dreaded Big Big Apple (Bucky Dent is the worm in that apple), friends told me in private and…

The Grove Cafe & Market – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Voracious readers*, avid aficionados of art and those aflame with a musical ardor know that great books, art and music are imbued with the power to transport them to another time and place. A recent influx of contemporary restaurants in Albuquerque also has that power. If you think about it, having a meal at most Duke City restaurants–transcendent though some may be–is just so…Albuquerque. There’s an almost boring consistency and sameness about many local restaurants. Their sole distinctiveness comes from the foods they serve. It’s very difficult, for example, to picture yourself on the beaches at Cabo San Lucas while sipping on a margarita at Garduño‘s. Noshing on mussels at the Indigo Crow just doesn’t feel like a leisurely repast…

Lily & Liam Bistro – Rio Rancho, New Mexico

Family owned restaurants have been called the heartbeat of a community, its pulse and its roots.  Beyond the tintinnabulation of silver spoons on ceramic coffee mugs and over the hum of conversation, restaurants become living links to the past and storehouses of memories.  They’re are a respite from the strife and stress of our daily vicissitudes.  They help us unwind, relax and catch up with friends and family.  In a sense, these beacons of comfort and repose often become family. Not all restaurants achieve this distinction, of course, and if they do, it usually doesn’t happen quickly.  Restaurants have to prove themselves over time with a combination of memorable food, a homey look and feel and mostly personable, attentive service. …

Duran’s Central Pharmacy – Albuquerque, New Mexico

In an early episode of the Andy Griffith Show, while contemplating a job offer in South America, Andy tried to assuage his son Opie’s concerns about leaving Mayberry. Instead, he wound up confusing Opie by explaining that people in South America ate something called tortillas. Opie wondered aloud why anyone would eat spiders (tarantulas). Had Opie ever tasted the delicious, piping hot, just off the comal 10-inch buttered orbs at Duran’s Central Pharmacy, it’s unlikely he would ever confuse those grilled spheres with any arachnid. That’s because Duran’s features some of the very best tortillas of any restaurant in New Mexico. These are not the flavorless, paper-thin, production-line, machine-fashioned orbs you find at some restaurants (can you say Frontier Restaurant).…

Slate Street Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico

In 2005, Slate Street and an eponymous bistro just north of Lomas became the toast (a garlicky bruschetta) of the town. The Slate Street Cafe opened its doors in July, 2005 in a heretofore lightly trafficked, relatively unknown street north of Lomas. Nestled in the heart of the legal district, the Slate Street Cafe is so, make that Soho cool. Its sleek, modern, high-ceilinged dining room, looming wine bar and capacious patio is frequented by some of Albuquerque’s most hip and beautiful people. It’s a breath of fresh air in a burgeoning downtown district where revitalization doesn’t always appear to be working. The Slate Street Cafe is the braintrust of a proven and very successful pedigree whose bloodline includes founding…

Java Joe’s – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“I hate chile powder.” ~Tuco Salamanca Breaking Bad, Season 2 Duty-bound to make himself available to the citizenry of the fledgling United States, newly elected president George Washington spent the night in so many private homes and inns that “George Washington Slept Here” remains a real estate cliché and tourist draw centuries later. Perhaps the closest similarly celebrated landmarks in the Albuquerque metropolitan area are the filming sites for the 16-time Emmy Award-winning television series Breaking Bad. Never mind that Albuquerque recently celebrated its Tercentennial–three hundred years of history. History is not what visitors want to see. They want to see the Duke City of Breaking Bad. Albuquerque, which itself became a character in Breaking Bad, is the home of…

Sunnyside Up Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“Keep on the sunny side, always on the sunny side Keep on the sunny side of life It will help us ev’ry day, it will brighten all the way If we’ll keep on the sunny side of life.” ~Keep On The Sunny Side Lyrics According to Statistica, a leading provider of market and consumer data, in 2019 the per capita consumption of eggs in the United States was 207.1 eggs.  That’s up from 177.7 eggs per consumer in the year 2000.  In a 2019 survey conducted by YouGov, an international research data and analytics group, respondents indicated their most preferred way to consume eggs for breakfast is scrambled eggs (36%).  Other choices were eggs over easy (18%), sunny side up…

Los 6 Hermanos – Bernalillo, New Mexico

Once upon a time (how many of you remember when seemingly all ancient fables and stories began with these four words?) there was a family of six Chinese brothers, each with a unique and amazing power. One of the brothers committed an infraction against Chinese law and was sentenced to death by the emperor. By asking for one last night at home the brothers were able to take each others place and thwart the king’s executioner’s attempt to kill them.  Eventually the executioner ran out of ways to run the execution and had to call it off. There are no cuentos or corridos, sagas or stories in Mexico involving six siblings imbued with exceptional abilities.  In fact, just about the…

¡Ay Mi Mexico! – Albuquerque, New Mexico

One syllable, one word, one simple expression…yet there probably is no more expressive interjection,  heart-rending cry or honest exclamation in the Spanish language than the simple word “Ay.” This–one of the most  diminutive among all words–can say and mean so much.  Depending on the context, “Ay” is used to express such emotions as: <happiness: think “¡Ay, Chihuahua” when Despicable Me patriarch Gru espies a black villain suit he covets; surprise: ¡Ay, Cabron! what are you doing home in the middle of the day?; exasperation: ¡Ay, Que Lastima! <pain or dismay: Bart Simpson’s ¡Ay, caramba!” when he saw his parents having sex. The versatility of “ay” is virtually unparalleled (though you can usually tell what meaning or mood a speaker is…

Foodtopia – Albuquerque, New Mexico

When a restaurant with the curious name “Foodtopia” surfaced in 2022, long-suffering readers of Gil’s Thrilling… probably realized an etymology lesson would soon be in order.   If the suffix “topia” intrigued you as much as it did your grandiloquent blogger, hang on.  First, a review of what we all know.  Utopia is “a seemingly perfect society, one without flaws, where everyone is content and conflict and strife are unknown.”  One example of a Utopian society is the movie Zootopia in which animals live in harmony and lions sing kumbaya with antelope.  More common than movies about Utopian societies are movies and literature about dystopia, “societies that are either extremely chaotic or extremely authoritative, a hellish place where most people…

Cafe Genevieve – Jackson, Wyoming

My friend and former Intel colleague Steve Caine will forever rue the day he asked me to help him with an expense report for a business trip he made to Portland, Oregon. His itemized expense report indicated he had dined twice at Chevy’s, a middling quality Americanized Mexican restaurant which wouldn’t survive in the tough Albuquerque market. I teased him mercilessly. Worse, when my boss saw what the commotion was all about, he immediately put Steve on double-secret probation. Steve has never lived down visiting a Chevy’s in Portland where he could have had some of the country’s freshest and best seafood. When the din died down, Steve admitted somewhat sheepishly that after two days in Portland, he was missing…