Papaburgers – Los Ranchos De Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Back in the 1960s, A&W’s Papa Burger was a rite of passage for me. By age nine, I had surmounted the phased progression through A&Ws burger family–Baby Burger, Mama Burger and Teen Burger–and was ready to prove my mettle with the largest of A&Ws burger family, one beefy behemoth only my dad, a paragon of masculinity, had ever ordered. Earning the right to order one was acknowledgement that I was growing into a man. Polishing one off brought newfound respect from my younger brothers, both of whom longed for the day my dad would order a Papa Burger for them. In the 1960s, A&W’s burger family signified a formidable line-up of burgers served in more than 2,000 A&W restaurants throughout the fruited plain and Canada. Each member of the burger family was represented by cartoonish fiberglass statues, the largest of which was the Papa Burger, a bald, vested gentleman holding a large frosted mug on one hand and a gigantic burger on the other. Papa Burger stood eight and a half feet tall and the frothy mug of root beer was three feet tall. Driving on Chavez Avenue just west of Fourth Street and espying a restaurant called Papaburgers brought…

Kitchen Se7ven – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

During a 1996 episode of Seinfeld, George Costanza, a self-proclaimed “short, balding, unattractive man” made the mistake of telling his fiancee he wanted to name his child “Seven” after his idol Mickey Mantle. To George’s chagrin, his fiancee’s cousin liked the idea so much she decided to name her own child Seven. Even as the cousin was being wheeled by an orderly into the delivery room, George tried in vain to convince her to name the child something else. Six, Thirteen, Fourteen, even…Soda. “it’s bubbly, it’s refreshing!,” he cried. When Chef Akio told us of the birth of his son just a day before our inaugural visit, we had to ask him if he’d be naming his son “Seven.” Obviously understanding the reference, he laughed and told us his son’s name would be Isaiah. The only seven in his family is the uniquely spelled “Kitchen Se7ven” he named his restaurant. If you’re looking for signage to guide you to his restaurant, you won’t find any. Kitchen Se7ven is located within the Kaktus Brewing Company on the western fringes of Nob Hill and eastern extremities of the University of New Mexico…you know, that weird corner bordered by Central to the South,…

Rockin BZ Burgers – Alamogordo, New Mexico

Since its inception in 2009, a number of competitors across the length and breadth of the Land of Enchantment’s 121,593 square miles have competed in the New Mexico State Fair’s Green Chile Cheeseburger Challenge. The inaugural champion was Badlands Burgers (since defunct) from Grants. Only one–a national chain at that–has repeated as champion. That would be Fuddrucker’s which reigned supreme in 2014 and 2015. In 2013, Sadie’s proved its culinary repertoire extends far beyond New Mexican food by winning the Challenge. After participating every year since the competition’s launch, Laguna Burger finally won it all in 2016. Two restaurants won the competition scant months after launching their restaurant operations–ABQ Brew Pub in 2010 and Rockin’ BZ Burgers in 2012. Rockin’ BZ Burgers, the sole Challenge winner currently not to have a presence in Albuquerque, was in business for all of four months when it clinched the top honors at Green Chile Cheeseburger Challenge in 2012. Consider that for a moment. With fewer than 120 days in business, Rockin’ BZ bested a dozen seasoned competitors to earn the most coveted culinary title in New Mexico. That speaks volumes about its award-winning green chile cheeseburger. Never mind that the trophy was grievously…

Toro Burger – Rio Rancho, New Mexico (CLOSED)

While watching a “sanitized for television” version of the audacious satirical comedy Blazing Saddles, my precocious six-year-old niece asked several questions with deep sociological implications: “Why is everyone in the town of Rock Ridge named Johnson? Why were all the town’s citizens white?” From her silence, you’d think my Kim was a “perp lawyering up” at a police inquiry. Rather than responding herself, she enjoyed seeing my brother and I hem and haw in trying to give accurate and age-appropriate answers. Far easier to answer were Blazing Saddles questions which inspired nostalgic reflection: “Is there a Howard Johnson’s Ice Cream Parlor in Albuquerque? Does Howard Johnson’s really serve only one flavor?” For those of us who grew up in the dark ages, Howard Johnson’s restaurants were almost as ubiquitous as McDonald’s are today. During its halcyon days (peaking in 1975), more than 1,000 “Ho Jo’s” restaurants and motor lodges dotted the American landscape, their distinctive orange roofs a familiar beacon for hungry sojourners. Among the restaurants’ culinary draws were its 28 flavors of butterfat-enhanced ice cream and fried clam strips, an exotic offering theretofore available only in New England. The Marriott Corporation’s 1982 acquisition of all Howard Johnson’s properties signaled…

Pete’s Frites – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

You might view my friend Schuyler’s insistence that his favorite vegetables are French fries, salsa and pizza as a fallacious premise, a non-sequitur fraught with absurdity. French fries are made from potatoes (botanically classified as a vegetable) so categorizing fries as a vegetable might not be a stretch, but pizza? How, you might ask, could any reasoning adult possibly consider pizza a vegetable? Schuyler’s argument is inspired from the beloved 1947 holiday classic Miracle on 34th Street. When ordered by the court to submit authoritative proof that Mr. Kringle is the one-and-only Santa Claus, Kringle’s lawyer Fred Gailey produced dozens of mailbags brimming with letters addressed to Santa Claus in care of the courthouse. Overwhelmed with this authoritative proof, the judge responded “Since the United States government declares this man to be Santa Claus, the court will not dispute it.” By now you’ve probably surmised that Schuyler must have uncovered authoritative proof in the form of a governmental declaration that French fries, pizza and salsa are vegetables. Indeed he has. He points out that in 2011, the United States Congress passed a bill that allows pizza and French fries to remain on federally funded school lunch menus, essentially declaring that…

Shake Foundation – Santa Fe, New Mexico

If it seems there’s a glut of restaurants brandishing a much-hyped and often self-glossed as “best” version of New Mexico’s fabled green chile cheeseburger, it won’t surprise you to read that yet another purveyor of the Land of Enchantment’s sacrosanct sandwich entered the fray in January, 2014. What might surprise you is its most worthy motto and raison d’etre: “Dedicated to the preservation of the original green chile cheeseburger.” Just what exactly does that mean? If, like me, your initial inclination is to question why at its pinnacle of popularity, the green chile cheeseburger needs to be preserved, you’re missing the point. Likewise, the motto has nothing to do with mimicking the burgers crafted by New Mexico’s two claimants to being progenitor of all green chile cheeseburgers: The Owl Cafe & Bar and Bert’s Burger Bowl. The Shake Foundation is all about preserving and honoring the inviolable traditions and impeccably high standards of the green chile cheeseburger. It’s about crafting the type of green chile cheeseburgers that trigger memories of unforgettable burgers past while creating new memories that will have you eagerly anticipating your next great green chile cheeseburger. Despite its “mission statement,” the Shake Foundation isn’t based solely on…

Laguna Burger (66 Pit Stop) – Albuquerque, New Mexico

In 2016 and 2017 my review of the Laguna Burger was the most frequently visited post on Gil’s Thrilling…  In 2015 and 2014, only one restaurant (Down N’ Dirty Seafood Boil) received more blog visits than Laguna Burger.  If even a small number of the visitors to the review actually also visited the restaurant, that’s thousands of visitors to Laguna Burger.  It’s probably safe to assume hundreds of thousands of visitors who haven’t read Gil’s Thrilling review have made their way to one of the four Laguna Burger locations, three of which are definitely off-the-beaten path.  In November, 2017, Laguna Burger established a presence at a 3,000 square-foot space on Avanyu Plaza on 12th Street near the Indian Pueblo Cultural Center in Albuquerque.  You can read my review of the 12th Street location here. The history of New Mexico is fraught with tales of hardship and peril. Enchanting as it may be, New Mexico is a land which can be harsh and unforgiving as early settlers found out when, amidst the ravages of climatic extremes, they traversed austere terrain in search of wealth and a better life. There were no interstate highways nor high-speed motorized conveyances to ferry them across…

Little Red Hamburger Hut – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

“I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.” – J. Wellington Wimpy Cultural shock! It’s been oft repeated that the United States and England are two nations separated by a common language. I had no idea how much the two nations are separated by more than language until 1979 when stationed at Royal Air Force Base Upper Heyford just outside of Oxford, England. Cultural differences were especially evident in dining experiences. Back then American fast food restaurants were as scarce in England as fish and chips restaurants were in the United States. McDonald’s, Burger King and Pizza Hut had just starting to make inroads in the megalopolis of London. In smaller cities, if we wanted an American hamburger, the only option was a chain of England-based hamburger restaurants named Wimpy’s. During my first visit to Wimpy’s there were many reminders we were not in America. First, service was on New Mexico time (and I say that with the utmost affection); the concept of fast food was apparently lost on the wait staff. Secondly, portions were parsimonious. The burgers weren’t the size of a frisbee the way American servicemen liked them. Soft drinks were merely eight-ounces, not the barrel-sized cups…

Griff’s – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

NOTE: On Wednesday, July 5, Griff’s announced that it will be closing its Albuquerque location on July 6th. According to the post, there have been too many incidents at the location making it “unsafe and undesirable” to continue operating there. Griff’s has other locations in Texas and Louisiana. The company said it hopes to return to Albuquerque someday. Adults of my generation lament that what separates McDonald’s, Burger King and Wendy’s from the hamburger chains with which we grew up is certainly not a superior product. It doesn’t take much to figure out that the “big three” sit atop the lofty burger throne because of aggressive product innovation and clever marketing that captured the young demographic. The big burger threesome (big five if you include Burger Chef and Tastee Freez) of my generation–A&W, Bob’s Big Boy and Griff’s Burger Bar–certainly serve (or served) a better burger by far. In the Southwest, A&W appears to have been relegated to sharing space with Long John Silver’s. Bob’s Big Boy is but an enigmatic smile triggered when you drive by JB’s Family Restaurant and remember when that restaurant space was claimed by the Big Boy. Of the aforementioned triumvirate of my youth, only…

Bang Bite Filling Station – Santa Fe, New Mexico

“When people pile seven things onto one burger, it drives me nuts!” ~Bobby Flay Seven ingredients? That’s not a burger! It’s a hodgepodge, a medley, a potpourri! It’s everything including the kitchen sink. Perhaps other regions in America need the Iron Chef’s sage advice, but New Mexicans certainly don’t. For us, a burger with minimal ingredients is just common sense. That’s because we’ve got green chile and when you’ve got green chile, who needs anything else? In the Land of Enchantment, our green chile cheeseburger is sacrosanct, a celebrated cultural tradition and an iconic food. The very best green chile cheeseburgers are made with no more than three to five ingredients (including the green chile and cheese) and those ingredients are intended to complement the green chile, not mask it. In the Land of Enchantment, it’s almost a foregone conclusion that almost every restaurant, drive-in, diner, dive, joint, cafe, roadside stand, eatery, greasy spoon, lunch counter and bowling alley slinging burgers is going to brag about its green chile cheeseburger being the best to be found anywhere. That is everyone but Santa Fe’s Bang Bite Filling Station which gregarious owner-chef Enrique Guerrero contends doesn’t even offer a green chile cheeseburger.…

300 Club Bar & Grill – Albuquerque, New Mexico

300! In the parlance of the bowler, it signifies absolute perfection, twelve consecutive strikes. According to some trusted foodies, the 300 Club Bar & Grill in Albuquerque’s Skidmore’s Holiday Bowl on Lomas just east of San Pedro serves a mean green chile cheeseburger, a 12-strike masterpiece, a perfect 300. This is a burger so good, it was one of the twenty contestants for the inaugural Governor’s Green Chile Cheeseburger Challenge in 2009. We all know the stereotypes about bowling alley food. When it comes to food, most bowling alleys strike out. Ardent keglers are subjected to such catastrophic “cuisine” as perpetually rotating hot dogs seared to a leathery sheen under a heat lamp inferno, soppy messes of nachos bathed in gloppy processed cheese topped with gelatinous jalapeños and greasy onion rings with the texture of fried rubber bands and as oily as well-slicked lanes. Getting something edible at most bowling alleys is as tough as picking up a seven-ten split. The fact that the 300 Club Bar & Grill has a separate entrance from the rest of the bowling alley is a promising sign. That promise is bolstered by its utterly charming sports bar ambiance which is wholly unlike the…