Category: Closed in 2023

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The Crack Shack – Salt Lake City, Utah (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

NOTE: In November, 2023, it was announced that all Utah Locations of The Crack Shack would be closing and transitioning to a new concep. tOnly culinary historians would call 2020 the “year of the fried chicken sandwich.”  Most of the rest of us would call 2020 the “year of the Cabrona virus” or the “year the world shut down.”  During that annus horribilis, some 50 chains introduced either brand new premium chicken sandwiches or upgraded former versions.  The instigator of the “chicken sandwich wars” was Chick-fil-A whose slogan boasts “we didn’t invent the chicken, just the chicken sandwich.”  In response Popeyes Louisiana Chicken debuted its own crispy fried chicken sandwich and posted a mean tweet disparaging Chick-fil-A’s claim.   So why did comfort seeking consumers flock to chicken chains in 2020?  The answer to that question is in the question itself.  During the Cabrona virus, consumers turned to comfort food to feel safe and in control.  Lesley Rennis of the City University of New York’s Health Education Department declared “Comfort foods not only taste good, they actually lessen the impact of stress hormones. ”Eating sweet and starchy food helps our bodies make serotonin which makes us feel calmer, and decrease…

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El Charlatan – Socorro, Texas (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

Everyone should have a friend like Steve Coleman, the erudite owner of Steve’s Food Page. Not only is he a great guy and a lot of fun to spend time with, he’s a superb host and tour guide.  During a two-day sojourn to “El Chuco,” Steve not only showed us the sights, he gave me a much-needed lesson about history New Mexico and Texas share.  He explained that during the Pueblo Revolt of 1680, members of the Isleta Pueblo in New Mexico were displaced to El Paso along with Oñate and the Spaniards.  Today, descendants of those Native Americans reside in a Native American Pueblo in the Ysleta section of El Paso just about three miles from El Charlatan, our dining destination.  We were looking forward to Steve ferreting us through the historic El Paso Mission Trail, a nine-mile route representing a segment of El Camino Real de Tierra Adentro (Royal Road of the Interior), the historic trail that ran from Mexico City to Santa Fe.  Alas, unseasonably fierce winds (another commonality New Mexico and Texas share) obfuscated our view of the churches as we drove past (at least one of) them.  On the Fujita Scale, a measure of wind speed,…

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Tortilla Kitchen – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

A sure sign Spring has arrived In rural New Mexico is the annual ritual of cleaning the acequias, the community operated ditches used to irrigate fields, gardens and lawns. Early in the morning, property owners or their designated paid representatives would convene at appointed spots to begin the effort. Work crews typically consisted of grizzled veterans, most of whom acted as “mayordomos” (bosses) and young bucks like me with strong backs. Not surprisingly, distribution of work was…shall we say, quite inequitable. The old-timers would order us around, shouting out instructions like elderly drill sergeants. Most of us youngsters didn’t mind. During frequent breaks we got to hear some of the most ribald and raunchy stories from highly respected elders. One I’ve never forgotten is when a thrice-married viejito was asked by a colleague “Do all women look alike?” “I’ll tell you honestly,” he responded “not even their tortillas look alike.” While the question was designed to elicit a response about a certain female, er…anatomical part, my take-away had everything to do with tortillas. My mom was (and still is) the very best tortillera in the Penasco valley. Her tortillas were on the thin side with beautiful pinto pony char spots.…

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The Last Call – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:05 AM

NOTE:  Shortly after the Last Call shuttered its doors, Cali Burrito Co. launched at the same familiar location. Its grand opening day was 1 December 2023. “Ah, but after the sunset, the dusk and the twilight, when shadows of night start to fall. They roll back the sidewalk precisely at ten and people who live there are not seen again.” ~John Denver: Saturday Night In Toledo Albuquerque has a reputation of being a town which “rolls up the sidewalk,” an expression used to describe towns where businesses close up early and night life is very limited (translation: bars close early).  The Land of Enchantment’s liquor laws mandate that bars close at 2AM, an hour apparently considered “too early” by those who describe the Duke City as a sleepy town.  As someone who considers it a late evening when we stay up to watch the opening skit on Saturday Night Live, terms such as “rolling up the sidewalk” and “last call” have very little personal relevance.  But there was a time… If you’re expecting salacious details of my debauched youth, you’ll be disappointed to learn my personal experiences with “last calls” were mostly as a designated driver for friends who often…

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Tikka Spice South Asian Street Food – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED*)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

*NOTE:  Only the brick and mortar version of Tikka Spice has closed.  Tikka Spice still operates out of a food truck. In baseball it’s called the “Triple Crown,”an incredibly rare achievement in which a player leads the league in average, home runs, and runs batted in.  To win the triple crown, a player must tremendous power to hit for distance as well as a very keen eye to hit baseballs thrown at nearly 100 miles per hour and place them on the field in positions that result in driving in runs.  In horse racing, the term Triple Crown represents a series of horse races for three-year-old Thoroughbreds, consisting of the Kentucky Derby, Preakness Stakes, and Belmont Stakes.  To win all three of these races is even more rare. There’s another Triple Crown competition that’s even more challenging and difficult to win.  That’s Edible’s Green Chile Cheeseburger Smackdown, an annual event held in Santa Fe every year since 2013.  This competition has one simple goal: to determine the best burger in New Mexico.  I would argue that the reason this competition is even more difficult to win than the aforementioned Triple Crowns is that the Smackdown is not an athletic achievement reliant on…

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Panaderia Guatemalteca Eterna Primavera – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

To truly understand the cuisine of Guatemala, it helps to understand why this Central American paradise is known as the “Land of Eternal Spring.”  With nineteen diverse ecosystems, Guatemala boasts of jungles, forests, beaches, volcanoes and an expanse of natural resources.  Thick, lush vegetation enrobes seemingly never-ending mountain landscapes in verdant hues.  Magnificent pristine waterfalls cascade over those mountains, feeding the rivers that nourish fecund lands.  A belt of fire formed by active volcanoes is often shrouded by clouds just as ominous.  Bordered at its west by the Pacific and by the Atlantic at its east, Guatemala is graced by a diversity of climates and elevations. Relatively mild year-round, the climate is tropical and sub-tropical but varies greatly in relation to altitude.  Topographical diversity ranges from sea level to mountains that climb to more than 13,000 feet.  Precipitation in excess of 150-inches per year prevail at higher elevations while near-desert conditions persist elsewhere.  In addition to its well-deserved sobriquet “Land of Eternal Spring,” Guatemala is fittingly known as “the heart of the Mayan world.”    Pride in the culture and history of one of world’s greatest civilizations and their formidable accomplishments is understandably deep.  For more than a thousand years,…

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Jerusalem – Taste of the Holy Land – Rio Rancho, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno9:45 AM

Judaism, Christianity, and Islam are inextricably tied to the ancient city of Jerusalem, the epicenter of sacred sites both unique and common to all three religions.  One of the oldest cities in the world as well as Israel’s capital city, Jerusalem has a prominent role in both the Old and New Testament.  According to Bible Study Tools, “the name “Jerusalem” occurs 806 times in the Bible, 660 times in the Old Testament and 146 times in the New Testament; additional references to the city occur as synonyms.” Surprisingly, Jerusalem is not directly mentioned by name in the Qur’an, even in its Arabic translation of Al Quds. As a lifelong Catholic (with the bad knees to show for it), the significance of Jerusalem was imprinted in my mind at an early age.  Catechism and Mass readings regaled us with stories of Jesus at the temple in Jerusalem as a precocious child listening, asking questions, and amazing Jewish teachers with his understanding.  We learned that Jerusalem was where a thirty-year-old Jesus was baptized by John, signaling the start of His ministry on Earth.  Jerusalem plays a prominent role throughout the life of Jesus, even onto His crucifixion at a knoll on the…

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El Cotorro – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

There’s a scene in the 2006 lucha libre (Mexican professional wrestling) comedy film Nacho Libre in which Nacho’s ectomorphic tag team partner Esqueleto (“the skeleton”) orders two grilled, buttered and chile-dusted elotes (corn-on-the-cob) from a street vendor. Esqueleto graciously attempts to hand one to Nacho who rebuffs the offer, knocks the elotes to the ground and bellows “get that corn out of my face!” That antagonistic act so enraged Esqueleto that he leaped on Nacho’s back and attempted to throw his corpulent partner to the ground. The sight of the two golden elotes tinged with red chile on the ground was funny at the time, however, after consuming the elotes at El Cotorro, we would consider knocking elotes to the ground an act of sacrilege and sheer madness. It’s no wonder Esqueleto was so upset. Sure we’ve had elotes elsewhere…plenty of elotes at a plethora of elsewheres, in fact, but only at El Cotorro have elotes made us swoon in appreciation. El Cotorro, which translates to “the parrot” in English is not what you might expect from a Mexican restaurant of that name. It’s not a restaurant named for the stereotypical squawking “Polly wants a cracker” parrot mascot some kitschy…

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Ale’s Cakes – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

Hypocrisy thy name is Gil. “For someone who whined so much about a one-hour (each way) commute to work, you’re willing to drive a hundred miles for lunch” my Kim lamented.  Our lunch destination wasn’t nearly a hundred miles away, but when you’re hungry it probably seems that way.  It would have seemed even further had we traversed the entirety of the street in which our intended restaurant is located. In fact, from its starting point to its terminus, that drive would truly have seemed interminable through all its winding and congested permutations. The street of which I speak is Albuquerque’s own Coors Blvd, otherwise known as New Mexico State Road 45.  According to Wikipedia, Coors Blvd is 22,918-miles long…er, make that 22.9-miles long though it does seem painfully longer than that (especially when you’re hungry).  Coors meanders parallel to the Rio Grande from the Southern boundary of Rio Rancho through Albuquerque and onto Isleta Pueblo.  It takes significantly longer to drive this route than it took the Mexican conquistadores to walk the Camino Real. Thank goodness for I-25 and Rio Bravo Blvd which shortened the length of our drive.  As we wended our way south on Coors, my Kim…

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Taqueria Los Amigos – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno12:01 AM

“On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air” ~Hotel California, The Eagles in 1977, when the Eagles’ immortal rock anthem Hotel California was released as a single, most radio hits clocked in at about three minutes.  Three minutes is just about as long as Hotel California’s hauntingly compelling intro and the legendary guitar-duet-slash-duel-slash-musical-conversation between Don Felder’s double-necked Gibson EDS-1275 and Joe Walsh’s Fender Telecaster. The high voltage, era-defining song with its intensely intricate instrumental work, soaring harmonies and enthralling lyrics make Hotel California an iconic indictment of the dark underbelly of the American dream and its excesses. Hotel California’s allegorical, introspective lyrics alone make it one of the most widely speculated songs in rock history.  Studies of those lyrics have resulted in numerous interpretations of the song.  Among the most widely contemplated lyrics surround the song’s first stanza: “warm smell of colitas rising up the air.”  At least three vastly different definitions of colitas exist.  Among the most common misinterpretations is one replete with sexual innuendo–specifically that colitas is sexual slang meaning “little tails.”  In Mexican slang, colitas also refers to cannabis. In numerous interviews, Don Felder has clarified…

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The Feel Good – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno5:42 PM

“Whoa! I feel good, I knew that I would, now I feel good, I knew that I would So good, so good, ’cause I got you So good, so good, ’cause I got you So good, so good, ’cause I got you.” ~James Brown The lyrics to the “Godfather of Soul’s” signature song aren’t etched on the windows or door of The Feel Good, but several other thematic aphorism are.  There’s Virginia Wolf’s quote, “One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.”  M.F.K. Fisher’s “Sharing food with another human being is an ultimate act that should not be indulged in lightly” is etched on the door while Alan D. Wolfelt’s sage “Food is symbolic of love when words are inadequate” occupies another window.  Maybe because it’s a shorter quote, James Beard’s “Food is our common ground.  A universal experience.” occupies a small window. One quote which perhaps should be etched on The Feel Good is San Francisco-based journalist Madison Park’s “Having a belly stuffed with comforting food can feel like a warm hug from the inside.”  In a 2010 article for CNN, Park explained why eating a lot feels so darn good.  You might…