Category: Closed in 2021

AlbuquerqueClosed in 2021Gone But Not ForgottenNew MexicoRated 23Thai

Siam Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

It’s oft been said that “you taste first with your eyes.”  Certainly sight figures in to the enjoyment of food and sets expectations, but the first sensory receptors to engage in taste is the sense of smell.  If you’ve ever experienced a pleasant aroma wafting toward you as you approach a restaurant, you’ll agree.  The Siam Cafe is quite possibly the most aromatically-enticing, olfactory-arousing restaurant in the Duke City.  Its exotic spices and herbs waft like a gentle summer breeze over all diners entering what is conceivably Albuquerque’s best Thai restaurant. For years the marquee named its previous occupant, Pollo Loco, before the owners of the Siam Cafe finally changed the marquee in 2003. With its new signage, this gem declared…

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Poppy’s Pizzeria & Italian Eatery – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

Chef-owner Mario D’Elia knew what he’d be in for when he named his new restaurant Poppy’s Pizzeria & Italian Eatery.  Legions of Seinfeld fans would undoubtedly joke  “Poppy’s a little sloppy,” a reference to Poppie, a restaurateur on the comedy Seinfeld who didn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom.  Sure enough,the jokes came…until the jokesters tasted the seriously outstanding authentic New York style pizza.  Poppy’s pizza is no joking matter.  So why would Mario subject himself to a spate of predictable and hackneyed jokes? Poppy, as you might know, is an affectionate nickname given to a father, grandfather or a male authority figure standing in a similar position.  Mario speaks with reverence and love about his poppy, the nurturing…

AlbuquerqueClosed in 2021Dog FriendlyGone But Not ForgottenMexicanNew Mexico

Guaca Guaca Tacos & Beer – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

What culinary voluptuaries consider exotic and delicious, timorous eaters might find distasteful and even nauseating. With M.F.K Fisher as their muse, culinary voluptuaries–the truly adventurous diners among us–don’t let themselves be drawn into a vortex of memories recalling foods they’ve already experienced. Instead, they live with carpe diem engraved on their hearts, ever in pursuit of their next culinary epiphany, the next “aha” moment when their taste buds awaken to never before experienced symphonies of incredible flavors. Sometimes to achieve the discoveries they crave, they have to reach into the distant past, their culture’s culinary roots. That’s certainly the case in contemporary Mexico where, for the past quarter-century or so, the scions of Montezuma have been frequenting restaurants and markets…

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Bacon Jam – Cedar Crest, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

“I think we love bacon because it has all the qualities of an amazing sensory experience. When we cook it, the sizzling sound is so appetizing, the aroma is maddening, the crunch of the texture is so gratifying and the taste delivers every time.” ~Alex Guarnaschelli NOTE: On July 31, 2020, the original Bacon Jam in Albuquerque closed its doors, but the Bacon Jam in Cedar Crest remains open.  While this review is based on visits to the Albuquerque location, I’m confident the Cedar Crest location will serve the same high quality food with the outstanding service we experienced every visit. With all due respect to the Iron Chef, we love bacon because we’re genetically disposed to love bacon!  It’s…

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Triple B’s Bar-B-Que Burgers & Burritos – Rio Rancho, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

Archaeologists in Spain claim to have unearthed the original man cave. What is most remarkable about this finding is how very similar Neanderthal man and contemporary man are. Men, it could be said, have not evolved much. Neanderthals were hairy and brutish in appearance, very much like the New York Giants and Philadelphia Eagles. They spoke in guttural grunts, similar to today’s politicians. Neanderthals scrawled their art on cave walls; contemporary man expresses himself artistically on bridges, underpasses and walls. Neanderthal man used tools: hammers, clubs and axes; contemporary man uses tools: television remote controls, joy sticks and iPhones. Cultural anthropologists (and Barbara Streisand) have long posited that throughout evolutionary history, man has had an inherent need for belonging to…

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California Pastrami & More – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

During a 1997 episode of Seinfeld, the “show about nothing,” George Costanza and his girlfriend du jour discussed the possibility of incorporating food into their lovemaking–not as a post-coital meal, but in flagrante delicto. George listed as potential food candidates: strawberries, chocolate sauce, honey and…pastrami on rye with mustard. Yes, that’s pastrami on rye. His girlfriend, unfortunately, failed to appreciate the erotic qualities of pastrami and thus, their relationship terminated. Ultimately George met up with a woman who echoed his sentiments when she declared pastrami to be “the most sensual of all the salted cured meats.” With that proclamation, their lustful appetites took over and they succumbed to the pastrami inspired throes of passion, albeit also incorporating television watching. It’s…

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Urban Taqueria -Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

My sagacious friend Bill Resnik is like a 6’5″ Yoda. Perhaps because he was a stand-up comedian for several decades, he seems to invite good-natured teasing from among our mutual friends and colleagues.  Like gunfighters sporting black hats in the westerns of yore, would-be comics seem to come out of the woodwork to challenge the fastest quipster in the west.  Instead of six shooters, the villains arrive sporting their put-downs, taunts and insults…and like the white chapeau-wearing good guy fighting on behalf of the forces of goodness and niceness, Bill dispatches them quickly with witty retort. I once asked Bill how he could put up with constant ribbing from colleagues and friends.  He reminded me that being offended is a…

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Need-A-Pita – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

If anniversary gifts are seen as a barometer for the health of a relationship, it’s a wonder any marriage involving men survives. Dozens of bad gift compilations across the internet would have you believe those of us with the XY-chromosome deficiency…er, pairing are notoriously bad gift givers. Instead of lavishing our spouses with romantic gifts indicative of our love, we give them practical things…such as universal remote controls, home brewing kits or outdoor pizza ovens we ourselves would like. Or we give them exercise equipment, not realizing the connotation might not be “I care,” but  “you’re fat.”  Then there are some of us who think the anniversary symbol for every year is plastic…as in a gift card.  Nothing says “after…

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Rosemary – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

“Eye of newt, and toe of frog, wool of bat, and tongue of dog, Adder’s fork, and blind-worm’s sting, lizard’s leg, and howlet’s wing– for a charm of powerful trouble, like a hell-broth boil and bubble.” Anyone who’s read Shakespeare’s Macbeth will recognize this incantation by three witches as they stir a boiling cauldron replete with the ingredients needed to conjure ghosts into their world so they can manipulate Macbeth, the future king.  Even among those of us who may have been required to memorize this famous stanza, the ingredients seem so malevolent.  Little did we know that most of those ingredients were actually rather innocuous.  Eye of newt, for example, was actually (depending upon which herbalist you consult) a…

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The Burger Stand – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

“If you need good hot grillin’, Try my burger stand. If you need a slice of thrillin’, I’m the baddest in the land. Any way you want it baby, I am your burger man.” ~Burger Man by ZZ Top Those of us invited on occasion to judge competitive food events try to follow a few very sensical but ironclad rules to ensure our evaluations are fair, balanced and accurate—or at least as accurate as any largely subjective matter can be. Though we commit these rules to memory, it’s very easy to forget about them and give way to unbridled desire, especially when you’re judging what has been deemed the best of the best, the most delicious of its genre. Such…

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Backstreet Grill – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno

Old Town Albuquerque. Locals love it. We appreciate its unique architecture and have tremendous affection for its character and personality. We hold its religious celebrations in reverence and admire the passion with which its secular fiestas are celebrated. We delight in reminding “colonists” that it’s older than many New England cities which dominate history books. Old Town is where we take all our friends and family who visit us. Much as we love it…and we do love it, many of us don’t visit Old Town as much as its proximity and charm might warrant. Ask locals why they don’t frequent Old Town and the more “honest” ones will likely tell you it’s because it’s no longer solely ours. We have…