Fuego 505 Rotisserie & Bar – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“I have become obsessed with cooking meat over fire. I get prepared for it. I make sure I’m hungry before I cook it. The smell of the smoke and the aroma of the crackling meat ignites some ancient genetic memories. It makes cooking and eating significantly better.” ~Joe Rogan, Podcast Host Those of us with a carnivorous bent can relate to Joe Rogan’s ode to cooking meat over fire.  There’s absolutely nothing as mouth-watering as the heady aroma and melodious sound of meat searing on the grill or sizzling in a pan.  An argument can easily be made that nothing evokes a wanton lust more than smoke perfumed by meat as it wafts toward our anxiously awaiting nostrils.  The sounds…

La Sirenita – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Our friends, John Martin and Lynn Garner and I couldn’t help but laugh. There before our very eyes was the depiction of a meme come to life. In the dining room of la Sirenita was a papier Mâché reproduction of the bottom half of a mermaid. It reminded us of a meme we recently shared.  That meme depicted a grizzled sailor marooned on a desert island.  On the first panel of the meme the sailor smiled lasciviously as a beautiful and buxom mermaid approached the island.  The second panel shows the sailor cooking the bottom half of the mermaid on a rotisserie.  Yeah, it’s gruesome, but come on, it’s funny, too. The bottom half of a mermaid wasn’t the only…

Ramona’s Mexican Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“No one who cooks, cooks alone. Even at her most solitary, a cook in the kitchen is surrounded by generations of cooks past, the advice and menus of cooks present, the wisdom of cookbook writers.” ~Laurie Colwin, Novelist Watch virtually any episode of Kitchen Nightmares and you might just be convinced that families can’t possibly work together in a restaurant.  Kitchen Nightmares, one of Gordon Ramsay’s eight-hundred or so television shows, is rather formulaic–Ramsay spends a week with a failing restaurant in an attempt to revive the business.  Almost invariably, the failing restaurant is owned and operated by a family.  Almost invariably, the drama falls just short of Homer strangling Bart.  Arguments on Kitchen Nightmares are loud and intense.  Copious…

Los 6 Hermanos – Bernalillo, New Mexico

Once upon a time (how many of you remember when seemingly all ancient fables and stories began with these four words?) there was a family of six Chinese brothers, each with a unique and amazing power. One of the brothers committed an infraction against Chinese law and was sentenced to death by the emperor. By asking for one last night at home the brothers were able to take each others place and thwart the king’s executioner’s attempt to kill them.  Eventually the executioner ran out of ways to run the execution and had to call it off. There are no cuentos or corridos, sagas or stories in Mexico involving six siblings imbued with exceptional abilities.  In fact, just about the…

¡Ay Mi Mexico! – Albuquerque, New Mexico

One syllable, one word, one simple expression…yet there probably is no more expressive interjection,  heart-rending cry or honest exclamation in the Spanish language than the simple word “Ay.” This–one of the most  diminutive among all words–can say and mean so much.  Depending on the context, “Ay” is used to express such emotions as: <happiness: think “¡Ay, Chihuahua” when Despicable Me patriarch Gru espies a black villain suit he covets; surprise: ¡Ay, Cabron! what are you doing home in the middle of the day?; exasperation: ¡Ay, Que Lastima! <pain or dismay: Bart Simpson’s ¡Ay, caramba!” when he saw his parents having sex. The versatility of “ay” is virtually unparalleled (though you can usually tell what meaning or mood a speaker is…

Foodtopia – Albuquerque, New Mexico

When a restaurant with the curious name “Foodtopia” surfaced in 2022, long-suffering readers of Gil’s Thrilling… probably realized an etymology lesson would soon be in order.   If the suffix “topia” intrigued you as much as it did your grandiloquent blogger, hang on.  First, a review of what we all know.  Utopia is “a seemingly perfect society, one without flaws, where everyone is content and conflict and strife are unknown.”  One example of a Utopian society is the movie Zootopia in which animals live in harmony and lions sing kumbaya with antelope.  More common than movies about Utopian societies are movies and literature about dystopia, “societies that are either extremely chaotic or extremely authoritative, a hellish place where most people…

El Camino Dining Room – Los Ranchos de Albuquerque, New Mexico

Many of us who predate, however slightly, the explosion of institutionalized fast food retain a fondness for the remaining independent family restaurants whose arsenal in the competition for hungry diners consists of reasonable portions of great meals at budget-conscious prices all served by a friendly and accommodating waitsfaff. An Albuquerque restaurant which epitomizes those ideals is the El Camino Dining Room, captured brilliantly above by the fabulous photographer Deanna Nichols. The El Camino was built by Clyde H. Tyler in 1950, five years after the latest “war to end all wars” and 13 years after Route 66 was “straightened” so that it would bypass Santa Fe completely.  Albuquerque was much more innocent back then.  Some might even describe it as…

Taos Diner – Taos, New Mexico (CLOSED)

FX on Hulu’s comedy-drama television series The Bear chronicles the adventures and misadventures of Carmen “Carmy” Berzatto, a James Beard Award-winning-chef who returns home to Chicago to run his family’s Italian beef sandwich shop after his older brother’s suicide. Unbeknown to the Chef, his brother left behind mountainous debts, a dilapidated kitchen, and an undisciplined staff.  The highly entertaining series has fueled a spike in the sales of Italian beef sandwiches (piles of thin-shaved roast beef slid au jus into a French roll and topped with giardiniera)–not only at Chicago-specialty restaurants across the fruited plain, but in restaurants (such as Albuquerque’s High Point Grill) inspired to try their hand at Chicago’s sacrosanct sandwich.  Sales of the classic Chicago sandwich are…

TIKKA HUT PIZZERIA AND KABOB HOUSE – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

“I’ll give you three guesses to tell me what tabula rasa means,” I challenged my friend and Wordle phenom Carlos.  “That’s easy,” my erudite amigo proclaimed, “Tabula Rasa was a silent screen actress in the 1920s.”  “Close,” I replied, “but you’re thinking about Tallulah Bankhead.”  “I was just kidding,” he demurred, “Everyone knows tabula rasa is a Mediterranean salad.”  “You’re getting closer,” I joked, “but the Mediterranean salad you’re thinking about is tabouli.”  On his third attempt, Carlos gave me the right answer: “I’m drawing a blank.” Tabula rasa, in fact, translates from Latin to “blank slate.” In psychology as well as in epistemology (theory of knowledge), tabula rasa refers to the idea that we are solely the product of…

The Whole Enchilada – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Perhaps because I was away from the Land of Enchantment for much of my Air Force career, one of my favorite bloggers has long been Lisa Fain, the James Beard award-winning “Homesick Texan.”   Like me, Lisa longed for home during the two decades she lived in New York City.  Like me, Lisa returned to her home state, the call of family, friends, bluebonnets, and Tex-Mex luring her back.  Also like me, Lisa is fiercely proud of the cuisine of the state she calls home.  Much of the enjoyment I derive in reading about her favorite foods is in noting the (sometimes vast) differences in foods just across the border.  Take for example cheese enchiladas which she calls “the essence…

El Rey Del Pollo – Albuquerque, New Mexico

My environmentally-conscious, Prius-driving friend Bruce “Sr. Plata” Silver has a much smaller carbon footprint than that carbon credit-trading hypocrite Al Gore.  No environmental activist would ever condemn Sr. Plata for fouling the air and water with a large amount of greenhouse gas emissions. Instead, he leaves large “al carbon fingerprints,” the finger-licking kind you get from frequenting restaurants which specialize in pollo al carbon, chicken prepared over charcoal. Pollo al carbon has spoiled Sr. Plata. He craves those juicy, spatchcocked, golden-skinned birds speckled with black char, chicken so meaty and delicious it makes store-bought rotisserie chickens look positively anorexic in comparison. Who can blame Sr. Plata?  Made well, pollo al carbon is absolutely addictive. “Finger-licking good” might be a cliche,…