Steam Q – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“I don’t know why men like to barbecue so much. Maybe its the only thing they can cook. Or maybe they’re just closet pyromaniacs.” ~Cecelia Ahern, P.S. I Love You >Whether or not the dubious and persistent stereotype about men and their grills has any veracity is a topic oft debated.  It’s been discussed anecdotally and it’s been analyzed scientifically.  In a 2010 article for Forbes, Meghan Casserly explained why men love grilling: “Grilling is sort of dangerous (there’s fire!), it lets dudes hang out together while also providing some sort of neutral entertainment (getting to watch one guy do stuff and possibly also criticizing him while he does it), and requires minimal cleaning (self-explanatory).” >In his 1993 essay “Why Do Men Barbecue?,” an article more about gender roles than about meat, anthropologist Richard Shweder expounded on the origins of male and female spaces in different cultures.  He posited that contemporary men and women throughout urban America don’t consider themselves tied to traditional gender roles.  So, where the men among our troglodytic ancestors brought home the mastadon for women to prepare (and bring them a beer or six), today’s men are just as likely to prepare the daily bread with…

Urban Hotdog Company – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Fat kids, skinny kids, kids who climb on rocks Tough kids, sissy kids, even kids with chicken pox love hot dogs. Armour Hot Dog Commercial, 1960s Advertising standards in the 1960s were quite a bit more lax than they are today. In today’s culture of American political correctness and woke idealogy, there’s no way an earworm-inspiring jingle such as the Armour Hotdog commercial would ever see the light of day, but back then it helped sell a lot of hot dogs. Even in the 1960s, Armour’s savvy ad agency undoubtedly understood the influence children had on the family’s food consumption budget. In addition to catchy jingles designed to appeal to children, Armour’s advertising agency enticed children with prizes to be had for a monetary pittance and a coupon cut out from the back of a package of its hot dogs. Not even parents were immune from Madison Avenue’s charms. They were swayed by assurances that hot dogs were actually good for children because they were “made from lean meat” and were “protein rich.” The 1963 United States census reported the production of 1.11 billion pounds of frankfurters and wieners, constituting thirty percent of all sausages made that year. Two years…

Thai Kitchen – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“There is no good meat that their stupid cooks do not spoil with the sauce they make. They mix with all their stews a certain paste made of rotten prawns…which has such a pungent smell that it nauseates anyone not accustomed to it.” No, that’s not a review published by a disgruntled diner on Zomato or Yelp. Nor is it Gil describing a chile dish to which liberal amounts of cumin were added. This scathing indictment was written in 1688 by Gervaise, a Catholic missionary from France. It was his tactless way of describing a Siamese meal at a diplomatic function he attended. Much has changed since Gervaise disparaged and insulted the cuisine of what is today Thailand, the only Southeast Asian country never to have been colonized by a European power. Gervaise, who would probably attribute the failure to conquer Thailand to the food, was probably not the first and he certainly wasn’t the only person to have criticized Thai food, but few have expressed it with such derision. Gervaise would no doubt be very surprised to discover how popular Thai food has become in the three centuries since his unsavory encounter. Thai food ranked sixth in a recent…

California Pastrami & More – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

During a 1997 episode of Seinfeld, the “show about nothing,” George Costanza and his girlfriend du jour discussed the possibility of incorporating food into their lovemaking–not as a post-coital meal, but in flagrante delicto. George listed as potential food candidates: strawberries, chocolate sauce, honey and…pastrami on rye with mustard. Yes, that’s pastrami on rye. His girlfriend, unfortunately, failed to appreciate the erotic qualities of pastrami and thus, their relationship terminated. Ultimately George met up with a woman who echoed his sentiments when she declared pastrami to be “the most sensual of all the salted cured meats.” With that proclamation, their lustful appetites took over and they succumbed to the pastrami inspired throes of passion, albeit also incorporating television watching. It’s no wonder George Costanza’s face grew flush when he ate with friends at their favorite neighborhood diner; the association of food with pleasure became a sensual one. I don’t know about pastrami being the most sensual of all salted cured meats (sounds like a bit of double entendre here), but do know there are few sandwiches quite as wonderful as a pastrami sandwich. Alas, not all pastrami is created equal. The perfect pastrami finds its genesis as brisket given a…

The Jealous Fork – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

In December, 1997, two-time James Beard award-winning author Deborah Madison penned a memorable article for Sunset Magazine.  Its  provocative title “Land of Enchiladas” certainly resonated with me.  Before relocating to the Santa Fe area where she now lives, Deborah would visit New Mexico quite regularly.  As with most New Mexicans returning home–whether from vacation or relocating permanently–the incomparable cuisine of our enchanted state was a priority even before she crossed into our sacred borders.  She always looked forward to that first plate of flat enchiladas smothered with red chili sauce. One bite and I knew I was in New Mexico. It tasted like home cooking, It tastes like home.  That’s a sentiment to which many of us can relate.  No matter where my Kim and I vacation or where I may be sent on a business trip, within three days I start to crave New Mexican food–the incomparable flavors of home.  Despite those cravings, I won’t succumb to the spangled wiles of restaurants purporting to serve similar food.  My friend and former Intel colleague Steve Caine once fell prey to a pretender and will forever rue the day.  Upon returning from a business trip to Portland, he asked me to…

The Shop Breakfast & Lunch – Albuquerque, New Mexico

In the 60s and early 70s, movies and television programs would have you believe all spies were hard-drinking, fast-driving, woman-chasing playboys as good with their fists as they were with a gun. They were worldly, sophisticated and charming, but could just as easily use guile and deception to get the job done. Bob Ayers, who worked in intelligence for 30 years in the U.S. Army and Defense Intelligence Agency counters those stereotypes: “All of that stuff about James Bond, that’s Hollywood. You don’t want anyone standing out in the intelligence business. You want someone nondescript. The ideal spy is 5-foot-6 and kind of dumpy.” That ideal—nondescript and dumpy—just wouldn’t work in the restaurant business…or would it? Restaurants, especially those which are generously bankrolled by corporate megaliths, tend to have a lot of cash, flash and panache to create the illusion of glamor and allure which brings in customers (and most of us are easily entertained). In addition to all the pristine veneer and effusive, over-the-top flamboyance money can buy, these restaurants tend to have catchy, memorable names which help in the establishment and proliferation of brand identity. They’re capacious, swanky, memorable and largely successful. Anyone who thinks this formulaic approach…

Seasons Rotisserie & Grill – Albuquerque, New Mexico

To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted. – Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 Despite America’s oft vascillating economic situation, new restaurants continue to sprout faster than New Mexico’s unofficial state flower (no, not the ubiquitous orange traffic cone; the almost as omnipresent tumbleweed). Rarely does a week go by without some sparkly and shiny new restaurant opening up somewhere in the Duke City. Though most start off with much promise and potential, many restaurants are destined to suffer a fate similar to the dreaded and accursed tumbleweed. The average lifespan of most independent restaurant concepts is less than five years. In 1995, Seasons Rotisserie & Grill was one of the shiny new restaurants with lots of promise and potential. A quarter of a century later, it continues to thrive against the onslaught of rigorous competition from newer, shinier and prettier new restaurants, outlasting many restaurants anointed the “next best thing” by the cognoscenti. Year after year, Seasons continues to be mentioned as one of the city’s very best restaurants and not…

Pop Fizz – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

NOTE: The review below is primarily for the Pop Fizz instantiation at the National Hispanic Cultural Center which closed during the Cabrona Virus.  Pop Fizz continued to operate at other locations, but did not have the comprehensive menu it once had.  Pop Fizz announced its closure in March, 2026. The geriatrically advanced among us who grew up during the golden age (1950s through the 1970s) of the “jingle” were constantly bombarded with earworm-inducing singing commercials, those catchy and memorable short tunes used to convey advertising slogans. We couldn’t help but sing along, often to the annoyance of our parents. When, for example, the Garduño family visited the big city (Taos), the kids would belt out the familiar jingle “Let’s all go to A&W. Food’s more fun at A&W. Have a mug of root beer, or maybe two or three.” Our dissonant din rarely persuaded our parents to take us to A&W. More often than not, we were ferried back to Peñasco for a home-cooked meal. Researchers suggest that women may be even more susceptible to earworms than men. That research was borne out when I suggested to my Kim that we visit Pop Fizz for lunch. Instead of asking what…

Philly Steaks – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“I love the dignity in the name Philadelphia, but at heart, we’re Philly.” ~Lisa Scottoline New York Times Best-Selling Author “There are a couple of things you should know about Philadelphia,” my friend Vladimir “Speedy” Gonzalez told me before my first visit to the City of Brotherly Love. “First, Philadelphians are not rude. We may be blunt and direct, but that’s just passion.” Passion? I always thought he was a grouch. “Second,” he added, “you’ve got to know the process for ordering a Philly cheesesteak when you visit Pat’s King of Steaks. If you don’t, you’ll be sent to the end of the line.” Sure enough, the Pat’s counterman didn’t appreciate my typical twenty questions ordering approach and sent me back to the end of the line, halfway around the block. Apparently what Vladimir called passion is pretty pervasive in Philadelphia. There are dozens of examples of that passion in sporting events, including a notorious 1968 event in which Eagles fans booed and pelted Santa Claus with snowballs. There are also plenty of non-sporting examples. In 1998, the Pennsylvania Public Utility Commission, which oversees taxis, mandated etiquette classes for the city’s cab drivers. Cynics called it “cabbie charm school” and…

La Reforma Brewery – Albuquerque, New Mexico

When my friend Schuyler saw the name of the restaurant on this review, he teased me that my life of dissipation, debasement and debauchery finally caught up with me.  “39-year-old juvenile delinquents like you belong in a reformatory.”   Being the mad scientist cerevisaphile he is, he also told it’s about time I ended my teetotaling ways.  “You’ve tried everything else.  Why not beer?”  Frankly, when my friend Ryan “Break the Chain” Scott first told me about La Reforma Taqueria, Brewery and Distillery, I had no idea what the context of the term “Reforma” meant, but doubted it had anything to do with a reformatory (which Wikipedia defines as “a youth detention center or an adult correctional facility popular during the late 19th and early 20th centuries in Western countries.” Mexican history, a subject in which I’m apparently woefully uneducated, recalls that La Reforma was the Mexican social revolution in the 1850s which led to the ouster of dictator Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna (you might remember him from The Alamo) and designation of Mexico as a nation state.   The revolution resulted in the creation of  the Mexican Constitution of 1857 which provided civil, political, and religious freedoms, and…

VARA WINERY & DISTILLERY – Albuquerque, New Mexico

In 1620, King Philip III of Spain issued a royal decree mandating that each of the 19 recognized New Mexican Pueblos elect by popular vote, a governor, lieutenant governor and other officers as might be needed to carry on the Pueblo’s affairs. The decree required that elections take place at the close of a calendar year with installation into office occurring the first week of the new year. In commemoration of each Pueblo’s recognized sovereignty, each governor was presented a silver-headed Vara de Soberania (Cane of Sovereignty) with a cross inscribed on the sliver mount as evidence of the support of the Church.  This symbol of the governor’s commission and authority has been passed on to succeeding governors ever since. * In 1629, nine years after the Varas de Soberania were issued, Fray Garcîa de Zuñiga and Antonio de Arteaga smuggled vines out of Spain. In defiance of Spanish law prohibiting the growing of grapes for wine in the new world, they planted New Mexico’s first grapes on the east bank of the Rio Grande slightly north of the village of present-day San Antonio. Thanks to the audacity of the two Catholic monks, the major shortage of wine in the…