Category: Rating: N/R (Not Rated)

AlbuquerqueRating: N/R (Not Rated)SaladSanta FeVegetarian/Vegan

Vinaigrette – Santa Fe, New Mexico

Gil Garduno3:20 AM

During a 1994 episode of Seinfeld, Elaine’s boss, Mr. Pitt becomes obsessed with finding a spaceship obfuscated within a stereogram, a computer-generated image that presents an optical illusion in which a 3D image is hidden within a single 2D image to be revealed only when the viewer focuses his or her eyes correctly.  To the detriment of a pressing business deal, Mr. Pitts loses three days trying to find the spaceship.  First he tries blurring his eyes as if staring straight through the picture before eventually finding success by employing an intensely deep focus. Placitas resident Gary W. Priester calls creating 3D stereographic images his “all-consuming passion for almost 15 years.”  Gary has authored three books on stereogram images and is one of two contributors to a Japanese stereogram magazine series which has sold close to four-million copies.  His work is mesmerizing in its ability to captivate the viewer.  Fortunately for those of us who don’t always focus correctly, Gary does us all a favor on his Custom Stereographic Web site by explaining exactly how to see stereograms. Gary’s clarity and focus aren’t  limited solely to stereograms.  He’s become a trusted advisor on dining options I might not otherwise know…

AlbuquerqueChineseRating: N/R (Not Rated)

Yummi House – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Gil Garduno9:01 PM

Years ago, I had the misfortune of working with a technical writer who couldn’t spell his way out of a paper bag.  His punctuation was pathetic, his vocabulary vacuous and his writing peppered with malapropisms (the incorrect use of a word by substituting a similar-sounding word with a different meaning).  Some comedians have made an art out of malapropisms, but there wasn’t anything funny about this terrible technical writer.  How he passed English classes at a state school which will remain nameless, much less become a technical writer, is beyond me.  Fortunately it didn’t take our employer long to realize the right thing to do about that writer was to let him go. In mock tribute to our departed former colleague, my friend Ken VanLyssel and I designated an office bulletin the “Don Cruize” (in his honor, his name is misspelled) bulletin board.  Every time we came across slaughtered syntax, shoddy spelling or any grammatical faux pas, we would tack it to that board.  Many of our contributions were courtesy of menus from Albuquerque’s Chinese restaurants.  Chinese restaurant menus, in general, are notorious for grievous grammar and are frequent fodder for Jay Leno’s Headlines segment.  We wondered if some of…

New MexicanNew MexicoRating: N/R (Not Rated)Travel Channel Eats New Mexico

Pepper Pot – Hatch, New Mexico

Gil Garduno12:55 PM

You might expect that a village renowned as the “chile capital of the world” could also boast of restaurants which showcase chile of such high quality that they would be veritable Meccas to which diners from throughout the state would pilgrimage.  With a population of 1,648 (as of the 2010 census), Hatch has fewer than ten restaurants, many of which do indeed seem to draw nearly as many visitors from outside of Hatch as they do local residents and most of which do indeed showcase red and green chile.  For New Mexican food, the one restaurant which most locals name as their very favorite is the Pepper Pot. Located in a converted residence, the Pepper Pot still resembles a family home, the give-away that it’s a business being prominent signage on a concrete plant stand.  Homey exterior implements such as an old-fashioned push mower and a miniature John Deere tractor adorn the lawn.  When you step into the restaurant and seat yourself in one of the dining room’s sixteen tables, you might notice that the ambiance is laden with Catholic symbols.  Even the flowers painted above the arched doorways resemble the roses on Juan Diego’s tilma.  A bulletin board recounts…

Fine DiningMissouriRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Savoy Grill – Kansas City, Missouri

Gil Garduno9:15 PM

In a 2012 episode of the Travel Channel’s “No Reservations” television program, host Anthony Bourdain and his Russian pal Zamir Gotta visited Kansas City in search of the city’s best barbecue.  When not licking barbecue sauce off their fingers, the peckish duo detoured to Stroud’s for the best fried chicken in the known universe and to The Savoy Grill for nostalgia and memories.  The Savoy Grill, a Kansas City landmark, has been making memories since 1903 when it was added to the Hotel Savoy.  Today, the Savoy Grill is the oldest restaurant in Kansas City while its home, the Savoy Hotel is the oldest continuously operating hotel in the United States west of the Mississippi River. During its inception, the Savoy Grill did not allow women, a situation that quickly ended.  The menu then offered prairie chicken and buffalo steak, delicacies which today would be considered exotic.  After dinner, tables were pushed aside for music and dancing late into the night.  The restaurant’s elegant features include stained glass windows, high-beamed ceilings, lanterns which were previously gaslights, tiled floors and an enormous carved oak bar.  One of the restaurant’s spacious booths has come to be known as the “President’s booth” as…

BarbecueDiners Drive-Ins and DivesFood Network Eats New MexicoKansasRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Danny Edwards Blvd. BBQ – Kansas City, Missouri

Gil Garduno9:49 AM

Kansas City is known as the “city of fountains.”  It’s also known as the “world’s barbecue capital.” If locals had their way, ever the twain would meet and the city’s fountains would be burbling not with water, but with barbecue sauce.  Barbecue sauce runs through the veins of local barbecue aficionados.  It’s an integral part of the city’s heritage.  More than at the other regions–the Carolinas, Texas and Memphis–in which barbecue is a religion, Kansas City pit masters know that sauce is the crowning touch to their low-and-slow handiwork. In combination with dry rub seasonings, the sauce gives smoked meats their personality.  It’s what you taste most along with the smoky flavor.  One of the very best barbecue sauces my friend Bill Resnik and I experienced during our September, 2012 barbecue tour of Kansas City comes from Danny Edwards Blvd BBQ, a  restaurant Food Network host Rahm Fama contends serves up the “best barbecue in the city.”  The best barbecue deserves the best sauce. At Danny Edwards, ketchup is the base for the sauce which also includes white and brown sugar, chili powder, mustard flour and allspice.  It’s not an overly assertive sauce, but the heat from the chili does…

BarbecueKansasRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Oklahoma Joe’s Barbecue – Kansas City, Kansas

Gil Garduno8:18 AM

You might expect that a magazine renowned for its staunch advocacy of healthy living and fitness would celebrate only healthful dining and that its food-related content would be penned only by paragons of physical fitness and health. Perhaps because it may want a broader, younger readership demographic, Men’s Health Magazine asked popular but vice-ridden sybarite Anthony Bourdain to author an article entitled “13 Places to Eat Before You Die.” Bourdain, whose seedy past includes heavy drinking, drug use, chain smoking and an addiction to pork wrote a thought-provoking “bucket list” which included restaurants and food–outstanding though they might be–which might actually accelerate your demise. What a way to go! Interspersed within Bourdain’s lucky thirteen restaurants, some of which are among the world’s most exclusive and highly regarded, is a barbecue restaurant in Kansas City, Kansas. Almost as big a surprise is that it’s not Arthur Bryant’s the world-famous 800-pound gorilla of Kansas City barbecue. Instead, one of the thirteen restaurants at which you should eat before you die is Oklahoma Joe’s which Bourdain touted as “the best BBQ in Kansas City, which makes it the best BBQ in the world.” Men’s Health Magazine’s infatuation with Oklahoma Joe’s wasn’t exclusive to…

BurgersIllinoisRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Billy Goat Tavern – Chicago, Illinois

Gil Garduno9:31 AM

The genesis of the idiomatic expression “got your goat” which means “to greatly annoy someone” is in dispute with sources attributing it to both the United States and England.  The American version has it that horse trainers would put a goat in a racing horse’s stall to keep it calm.  When bettors wanted a horse to race badly, they took it away (ergo “got someone’s goat”) and the horse would become agitated and run badly.  No evidence exists to support this legend.  According to the English version, keeping a goat in the barn has a calming effect on cows, thereby motivating them to produce more milk.  When rapscallions wanted to upset competing cattle ranchers, they would abscond with their goat rendering their cows less to non-productive. In Chicago, the phrase “got your goat” has meant something entirely different since 1945, the very last time the Chicago Cubs played in the World Series.  That’s more than 67 days of ineptitude and frustration.  That’s the power of the “billy goat curse” and it all happened because Cubs owner P.K. Wrigley prevented local Greek restaurateur William “Billy Goat” Sianis and his pet goat Murphy from going through the turnstiles to watch game four…

Closed in 2017Gone But Not ForgottenIllinoisRating: N/R (Not Rated)SteakUnited States

David Burke’s Primehouse – Chicago, Illinois (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno11:48 PM

By day, my friend James Sorenham was an architect of his business group’s data warehouse and business intelligence strategies.  By night and on weekends, James was a gentleman farmer tending to a small herd at his Broke Again ranch outside Portland, Oregon.  James took immense pride in raising prized beef cattle and kept his colleagues apprised of their progress through his weekly status reports.  Alas, his writing skills weren’t in the same zip code as his data management skills so when he reported that he had “personally inseminated sixteen cows,” he got teased mercilessly about his deviant bestial activities. The fact that David Burke is the first chef to own his own bull means “personal insemination” of beef cattle can best be left to the bovine persuasion.  That leaves Chef Burke to follow his passions as one of America’s most pioneering chefs and self-proclaimed chef, artist, entrepreneur and inventor.  The New York-based Burke is a practitioner of culinology, a revolutionary approach to food that blends technology and the culinary arts.  By experimenting with interesting ingredients and cooking techniques, he has developed such culinary innovations as an edible bacon candle which can be lit, smelled and eaten.  His innovative style translates…

AmericanCaliforniaRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Indigo Moon Cafe, Wine and Cheese Shop – Cambria, California

Gil Garduno5:34 PM

It might be easy to dismiss Cambria as a “jumping off” point to some of California’s most spectacular and  popular sites…until you actually visit Cambria.  That’s when you discover that there is plenty to see and do in this picturesque seaside village on the Central California Coast which Forbes.com declared “one of America’s prettiest towns.”  It’s a town virtually surrounded on three sides by towering pines and Monterey Cyprus which form a natural canopy over the beachside boardwalk.  To its west is the shimmering Pacific Ocean with some of the most pristine, unspoiled beaches in the state. Cambria virtually unfolds along the fabled Highway 1 at exactly the halfway point–240 miles–from both San Francisco and Los Angeles.  Just barely above sea level, Cambria may not have the dramatic cliff-side vistas for which Big Sur is renowned, but its beaches are much more approachable.  So are the elephant seals which frolic and lounge on the Piedras Blancas rookery a few miles away.  The most popular draws in the area are Hearst Castle, the European-style home of newspaper magnate William Randolph Hurst, and the numerous wineries and vineyards throughout the area. Within Cambria, you’ll find an eclectic shopping district with something for…

AmericanCaliforniaRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Nepenthe Restaurant – Big Sur, California

Gil Garduno11:11 AM

With all the travails and vicissitudes of  modern life, we can all use  a respite or safe harbor to which we can escape…where we can take a break from all our worries.  Big Sur, California, which most would consider an escape in and of itself has a dining destination which has been nourishing diners both physically and spiritually  for more than six decades.  It’s called Nepenthe, a Greek word which can be translated to “isle of no care,” “a place to find surcease from sorrow.” Lest you get the impression Nepenthe is a real-world Cheers tavern, it is oh, so much more.  First, if there’s a true paradise on Earth (other than New Mexico, of course), it may well exist on the Central California coast in Big Sur, a seaside idyll which will take your breath away and calm you with its vast expanse of tranquil waters and spectacular views of towering redwoods and precipitous cliffs in a climate that can only be described as perfect. If such a seaside idyll has a heart and soul, it is Nepenthe. The word “Nepenthe” first appears on the fourth book of Homer’s Odyssey, though its reference wasn’t as a place of respite,…

CaliforniaRating: N/R (Not Rated)SeafoodUnited States

Schooners Coastal Kitchen & Bar – Monterey, California

Gil Garduno8:20 AM

Cannery Row in Monterey in California is a poem, a stink, a grating noise, a quality of light, a tone, a habit, a nostalgia, a dream.” ~John Steinbeck Cannery Row, 1945 During basic military training in the Air Force, several of us who could speak multiple languages were asked to take the Defense Language Aptitude Battery (DLAB), the test the military services use to measure aptitude to learn a foreign language.  Fewer than five percent of people who take (or retake) the DLAB pass it.  Somehow I managed a high score and was extended an opportunity to attend the Defense Language Institute Foreign Language Center at the Presidio of Monterey.   My response, one borne of ignorance and stupidity, was “I don’t want to go to Mexico.”  It had not dawned on me that the Monterey being offered was in California.  Over the years, I’ve revisited my decision frequently.  On one hand, the Air Force might have decided to have me learn Arabic or Iranian then stationed me on a remote mountaintop to listen to and decipher chatter.  On the other, the year or so spent in Monterey would have been glorious (other than the hours of poring over language tapes…