Category: Arizona

ArizonaBurgersUnited States

In-N-Out Burger – Chandler, Arizona

Gil Garduno2:48 PM

During a 2011 episode of Break the Chain, the enlightening and entertaining food-centric radio program hosted by the brilliant Ryan Scott, Larry McGoldrick, the professor with the pulchritudinous palate, made some rather unkind comments about Blake’s Lotaburger, an exclusively New Mexico institution.  I cautioned him that local listeners might show up at the radio station armed with pitchforks and torches. That’s how much New Mexicans love the burger franchise whose motto reminds them that “If you are what you eat, you are awesome.” It’s not always easy to express your opinion about something as sacrosanct and beloved as Lotaburger, but inspired by Larry’s honesty, let me share my thoughts about In-N-Out Burger, a California institution that’s beloved beyond the Golden State, a burger restaurant National Geographic named the second best burger in the fruited plain in its “Top 10 Best of Everything” for 2012.  When it comes to In-N-Out, I’m most definitely in the minority.  I don’t get it at all… I first found out about In-N-Out Burger in 1987 while developing psychometrics for the United States Air Force in San Antonio, Texas.  Two of my test-writing colleagues were native, In-N-Out Burger obsessed Californians who never seemed to take off…

ArizonaClosed in 2019Gone But Not ForgottenRating: ExcellentThaiUnited States

Mint Thai – Gilbert, Arizona (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno8:41 AM

You might assume that because of my unabashed online promotion of culinary adventures, I would be the classic prostheletizer seeking to convert to the joys of more adventurous dining all lost and wayward souls who frequent chain restaurants. Alas, when traveling with colleagues who are either pedestrian about their dining preferences (they eat to live) or are wholly resistant to trying anything new or different, I tend to defer to their lifestyle choices. It beats listening to comments such as “yech, how can you possibly eat that?” and “that’s not in any of the food groups I know.” The offshoot is that I eat in more chain restaurants than you’ll ever hear me admit to (I don’t write about them for risk of being called a nattering nabob of negativism). By being able to compare and contrast restaurant chains with my beloved independently owned eateries, I’m able to derive a sense of perspective that hopefully makes any disparaging comments I may make about those chains more credible. At the very least, visiting chains heightens my appreciation for mom and pops all the more. Traveling with colleagues to the Phoenix area has meant choking down chow at a lamentable litany of local…

AmericanArizonaRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Roadkill Cafe – Seligman, Arizona

Gil Garduno9:20 PM

 I had my dinner yesterday In a place they call the Roadkill Cafe They serve their dishes full of tricks Scraped off Highway 66. From the Roadkill Cafe menu The legality of gathering and consuming roadkill varies from state to state.  In Tennessee, gathering and consuming flattened fauna (save for domestic pets) is not only perfectly legal, it made for great comedic fodder when Volunteer State native Al Gore ran for the Presidency.  In Maine, the police have to tag the furry Frisbees before you can take them home to cook it, while in Wyoming, the tagging is done by a game warden.  Only if you have a scientific collecting permit and plan to study it can you pick up roadkill in California.   Arizona state laws not only prohibit gathering and consuming roadkill, jurisprudence specifically prohibits the hunting of camels.  States in which roadkill is legal would envy the menu at Seligman, Arizona’s famous Roadkill Cafe on Route 66.  The menu includes such flattened food and car-crashed carrion as “Rack of Raccoon,” “Long Gone Fawn,” “Rigor Mortis Tortoise,” and “The Chicken That Almost Crossed the Road.”  Political correctness doesn’t spare the child either.  The children’s menu includes “Donald Forgot to…

ArizonaRating: Very GoodThaiUnited States

Malee’s Thai Bistro – Scottsdale, Arizona

Gil Garduno1:47 AM

Many a time have I luxuriated in the pleasures of a memorable repast at a restaurant outside of New Mexico and found myself thinking “if only these tastes were available back home.”  I typically then fantasize about bringing those tastes to the Land of Enchantment myself.  Alas, lofty intentions, a profuse lack of culinary talents and the absence of the capital necessary to realize my fantasies subsume those dreams and I instead yen for future visits to restaurants whose incomparable tastes have captured my reality. In Deirdre Pain, I found someone through whom I can live vicariously.  An aficionado of Thai food, she became disillusioned with most Thai restaurants, many of which lacked wine lists and whose wait staff struggled mightily with English.  In 1987 with the launch of Malee’s Thai Bistro (affectionately known as Malee’s on Main), she created an upscale venue for the exceptional cuisine of a favorite chef. Today Malee’s on Main is one of the most popular and highly regarded (earning a “24” rating on Zagat’s) Thai restaurants in the Phoenix area.  Housed in a circa 1921 building with a colorful history, Malee’s is only one of few restaurants on Main Street, denizen for a veritable pantheon…

AmericanArizonaRating: N/R (Not Rated)United States

Cafe Cornucopia – Bisbee, Arizona

Gil Garduno7:46 AM

The Hollywood stereotype of restaurant critics paints them rather unflatteringly as condescending misanthropes to be feared. Those stereotypes would have you believe restaurant critics are eager to pounce on and expose the slightest imperfection.  Armed with pedantic palates and polysyllabic vocabularies overflowing with unfavorable adjectives, critics are painted as joyless beings whose quest it is to impart their misery on the restaurants they evaluate.  To the critic, the exemplar is French cuisine and everything else is so much schlock to be disdained. Consider the 1988 movie Mystic Pizza in which a snobbish restaurant critic renown for his “make or break” reviews deigned to visit a pizza parlor of all places.  With a stern countenance and belittling attitude, he based his entire review on having sampled little more than one bite.  Ostensibly his palate was sophisticated enough to render a verdict on the pizza after a minuscule sample. Even the restaurant critics on animated features tend to be snotty. The aptly named Anton Ego from the delightful 2007 Pixar movie Ratatouille may have summed it up best: “In many ways, the work of a critic is easy.  We risk very little yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work…

ArizonaClosed in 2020Fine DiningGone But Not ForgottenMexicanUnited States

Cafe Poca Cosa – Tucson, Arizona (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno8:48 PM

Stereotypes would have you believe English food and Mexican food are at the opposite end of the spectrum from one another…as different as day and night.  Those stereotypes paint English food as bland and unimaginative while Mexican food is depicted as spirited and exciting.  That makes it deliciously ironic that perhaps the foremost authority on Mexican food is an adventurous English woman named Diana Kennedy.  In 1957, she moved to Mexico and has spent most of her life since researching and documenting the culinary history of Mexican cuisine. For her inestimable contributions to the documentation of regional Mexican cuisine, the government of Mexico awarded her the “Order of the Aztec Eagle” award, the Mexican equivalent of knighthood while Queen Elizabeth herself dubbed her “Member of the British Empire,” an award of similar distinction.  Once described in The Seattle Times as “the diva of doing it right,” Diana Kennedy champions authenticity in technique and ingredients and she’s a stickler for precision. The late Craig Claiborne, pioneering food critic for the New York Times, once described Mexican cuisine as “peasant food raised to the level of high and sophisticated art,” an apt description of how Diana Kennedy elevated the cuisine of her adopted…

ArizonaHot DogsMexicanRating: N/R (Not Rated)SandwichUnited States

BK Carne Asada & Hot Dogs – Tucson, Arizona

Gil Garduno9:48 PM

Every region across the fruited plain seems to have its iconic foods–incomparable dishes that define the area because they’re prepared better in that region than anywhere else.  Though there may be many capable practitioners in the preparation of these beloved and celebrated regional favorites, invariably there are restaurants with legitimate claims to superiority–stand-outs which, by virtue of consistent excellence over time, have earned acclaim from savvy locals and pundits. When these paragons of mastery in the iconic cuisine are in close proximity to one another, spirited disputes generally ensue among locals as to which restaurant’s rendition truly reigns above all others.  The City of Brotherly Love, for example, becomes a dysfunctional family when proponents of its eponymous Philly Cheesesteak sandwich get together to debate the supremacy of either Pat’s King of Steaks or Geno’s.   To a lesser and certainly more civil extent, New Mexicans will dispute who makes the better green chile cheeseburger–the venerable Owl Cafe or the relative upstart, Manny’s Buckhorn Tavern. The premise of the Travel Channel’s Food Wars program is to settle rivalries among those most celebrated of local favorites, pitting “the nation’s most famous culinary rivals against one another for a final showdown, where a blind…

ArizonaBurgersClosed in 2020Gone But Not ForgottenUnited States

Delux Burger – Phoenix, Arizona (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno5:07 PM

“I ordered a cheeseburger at lunch the other day. I had never eaten at this particular restaurant before, and whenever I am unsure about the quality of the food at a place, I always order a cheeseburger. How many ways can you foul up something as simple as a cheeseburger? The bread can be too hard, or the meat might not be cooked to your liking, but that can be fixed quite easily. After I ordered my cheeseburger – medium well with a soft bun – the waiter asked me, “Do you want a plain cheeseburger or one of our specialties?” There is such a thing as a specialty cheeseburger? A cheeseburger is a piece of hamburger meat with some cheese on top of it served on a hamburger bun.” Leave it to humorist Lewis Grizzard to succinctly sum up the truth to which “purists” across the fruited plains hold fast about their beloved burgers–that it’s all about the beef with “some” cheese.  Alas the burger in which the sacrosanct flavor of beef is the focus rarely earns accolades for its solid, if unspectacular and unadorned qualities.  Invariably when you read about a burger earning acclaim as “best in town,”  that burger is crowned…

AmericanArizonaClosed in 2014Gone But Not ForgottenRating: OutstandingUnited States

Orange Table – Scottsdale, Arizona (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno2:22 AM

There are several scenes in the delightfully heartwarming animated Disney movie Ratatouille that resonate with all gastronomes who delight in the sensual pleasures of the dining experience–those for whom food is an enchanting adventure in the discernment and love of its subtle nuances and overt fragrances, tastes, textures and colors. France’s preeminent chef Anton Gasteau, a pivotal character in the movie, describes this sensual adventure best: “Good food is like music you can taste, color you can smell. There is excellence all around you. You need only be aware to stop and savor it.” The scene which may resonate best with this gastronome is when Remy (a provincial rat with a heightened sense of smell and with aspirations of becoming a great chef) places a morsel of cheese in his mouth and closes his eyes as the fabulous flavors of the fetid fromage envelop him. His mind’s eye is awash in vivid shapes and colors as his taste buds truly savor the experience. In combination with other ingredients, those vivid shapes and colors become a complex and brilliant kaleidoscope of beautiful symmetry. This symmetry is reality for those who learn to live to eat–those for whom food is so much…

ArizonaClosed in 2018Gone But Not ForgottenNew MexicanUnited States

Los Dos Molinos – Springerville, Arizona (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno8:47 PM

Just how hot is the chile at Los Dos Molinos? The New York Times suggests you “travel with a fire extinguisher” and that “everything, with the exception of the margaritas, is incendiary.” New York magazine raves that “Not since Drew flashed Dave has Manhattan witnessed a hotter display than the one at Los Dos Molinos.” The Arizona Central dining guide asks “can you take the heat,” calling Los Dos Molinos “the lodestone for leather tongues.” Now these are all unimpeachable sources with impeccable credibility (at least when it comes to restaurants), but the source that got my attention quickest was a Garfield comic strip in which the irascible cat is challenged to a hot pepper eating contest by Jon, Garfield’s long-suffering human companion. In the first panel, Jon pops a jalapeno pepper into his mouth without breaking a sweat. Garfield follows with a cayenne pepper which Jon then one-ups with a Habanero which draws more than a bead of sweat. Not to be outdone, Garfield tosses a “Los Dos Molinos Death Pepper” into his mouth. The pepper is so incendiary that in dragon fashion, he shoots a massive fireball out of his mouth, scorching Jon in the process. Holding an…

ArizonaClosed in 2022FusionGone But Not ForgottenUnited States

Chino Bandido – Chandler, Arizona (CLOSED)

Gil Garduno6:51 PM

Gustavo Arellano has the right idea. The brilliant and hilarious author of Ask A Mexican, a widely syndicated alternative newspaper column, confronts the “bogeymen of racism, xenophobia, and ignorance” with humor. In his weekly column, he defeats stereotypes and those who wield them by using deprecatory wit to exaggerate those stereotypes to the point of the ridiculous. In the Language chapter of his uproarious book, he provides a list of commonly used Mexican terms and phrases so that “you, too, can become a Mexican.” The book defines a “Chino” as “literally “Chinese,” but the catchall phrase Mexicans use for all Asians regardless of nationality.” This is clarified with the example: “Vietnamese food is my favorite Chino cuisine.” I found it deliciously ironic when my friend and fellow gastronome Bill Hanson told me about a Phoenix restaurant named Chino Bandido which supposedly takes “fusion” cuisine to a new level.  Fusion cuisine is the inventive combination of diverse, sometimes disparate culinary traditions, elements and ingredients to form an entirely new genre. In large metropolitan areas, particularly in California, the fusion of different cuisines is commonplace. Restaurants featuring the melding of French and Chinese cuisine are especially popular. The joining of Mexican and…