Mint Tulip Vegan Cafe – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

“Once a year during a certain holiday in November, meat-eaters use the hollowed-out rectum of a dead bird as a pressure cooker for stuffing. And people think vegans are weird because we eat tofu?” ~Gary Yourofsky In the spirit of the much debated question of “nature or nurture,” my inaugural visit to The Mint Tulip Vegan Restaurant prompted my own philosophical contemplation, “are veggie haters born or made?”  The answer is probably a little of both. Many of us were–as children–traumatized by well-intentioned parental chiding or threats regarding vegetables: “Eat Your Vegetables!”   “You’re not leaving this table until you eat your rutabaga!”  “No dessert until you finish all your vegetable medley!” Then there are those of us who were once served a mushy bowl of peas, an overcooked plate of carrots, spinach suffering from freezer burn and the like.  Others of us may have, in an effort to lose weight, endured a fad diet consisting solely of certain vegetables.  Whatever the reason, it’s no wonder so many people become veggie-haters.  The problem with hating vegetables is that they are, almost inarguably, the most healthful food group on Earth.  Vegetables are an amazing source of antioxidants, fiber, phytochemicals. potassium and other…

2000 Vietnam Restaurant – Albuquerque, New Mexico

JERRY: “By the way Newman, I’m just curious. When you booked the hotel, did you book it for the millennium New Year?” NEWMAN: (smug) “As a matter of fact, I did.” JERRY: “Oh, that’s interesting, because as everyone knows, since there was no year zero, the millennium doesn’t begin until the year two-thousand and one.  Which would make your party one year late, and thus, quite lame.” It’s likely only Jerry Seinfeld and a few chronologically savvy people even know that “2000” and “the Millennium” are not synonymous. When it first launched and for years thereafter, a popular Duke City Vietnamese restaurant was actually named 2000 Millennium Restaurant, a semantically incorrect term. Today, the name on the marquee reflects the year in which the restaurant was launched (which also happens to be the reason behind its quaint name). Aside from its quirky, uniquely Albuquerque name and an intriguing menu (which includes a few items heretofore not found in the Duke City), what draws the most attention to the 2000 Vietnam Restaurant is the Saigon Express Emissions Testing facility in a garage attached to the restaurant. Its presence has undoubtedly engendered trite scatological references to emissions and Vietnamese food. Diners who…

Al’s Big Dipper – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Raj: “Actually, in India, the names of constellations are different. Where you have the Big Dipper, we have the Big Curry Pot.” Summer: “You’re making that up.” Raj: “You got me. Now what are you going to do with me?” ~The Big Bang Theory On a clear night, rural northern New Mexico’s ebony night skies are punctuated with a magnificent display of heavenly beauty uninterrupted by light pollution.   Star gazers stand in reverent awe and wonder at the clarity of a celestial sphere in which the jewels of the night sky are arrayed in the fixed patterns which inspired ancient Greeks to name these constellations for mythological beings.  Back-dropped by the stellar Milky Way in the winter skies is the spectacular Big Dipper, a distinct asterism of seven stars recognized from time immemorial.  Al’s Big Dipper, a gourmet soup and sandwich shop in Albuquerque’s Downtown district isn’t named for the most famous of constellations, but for its familiar ladle (or dipper) shape.  The shop’s marquee is festooned with an orange ladle, denoting the availability of steaming hot soups ready to be poured.  Located on historic Route 66 between Fifth and Sixth Streets, the soup and sandwich shop is named for…

Tacos Mex Y Mariscos – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

The taco landscape across the Duke City may well be a tale of two tacos. At one extreme we have Zacatecas Tacos & Tequila, the upscale, gourmet taco eatery situated in fashionable Nob Hill. In February, 2013, Zacatecas Tacos was named a semi-finalist for the James Beard Foundation‘s “best new restaurant” in America honor. Zacatecas Tacos represents the “self-actualization” of tacos…tacos which are all they can be…tacos which have been elevated to the nth degree of creativity and deliciousness…tacos at a price point heretofore not achieved in Albuquerque by what is essentially a street food favorite. The antithesis of Zacatecas Tacos & Tequila may well be Tacos Mex Y Mariscos, a timeworn restaurant on heavily trafficked Fourth Street.  Situated in an edifice which previously housed everything from a Thai restaurant to a sandwich shop, Tacos Mex Y Mariscos is as humble as Zacatecas Tacos is ostentatious.  It’s as much a “cheap eat” as Zacatecas is pricy.  The menu at Tacos Mex is simple and unsophisticated compared to the complex and urbane menu at Zacatecas.  From all conceivable appearances, Tacos Mex Y Mariscos is the pauper to Zacatecas’ prince. There’s even a socioeconomic dichotomy between the customers who habituate these two…

Fox’s Pizza Den – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

There may have been no more amusing (or, tragically, accurate) depiction of the “meat market” that was the dating scene in the 1970s than a recurring Saturday Night Live skit about two wild and crazy guys named George and Yortuk Festrunk. The Czech brothers, portrayed brilliantly by Steve Martin and Dan Akroyd, dressed in tight pants and loud, unbuttoned polyester shirts with medallions singing over their chests. They lived for “swinging” in their bachelor pad.  The hedonistic Festrunk brothers especially loved to cruise the fox bar in pursuit of swinging foxes who might just have the hots-on for them and who might let them hold on to their big American breasts. In their minds, there was no other pair of Czech brothers who cruised and swung as successfully in their tight slacks which gave them great bulges. It’s hard to believe that in the 70s, “foxes” was a term not used exclusively to describe a carnivorous animal. It was also used as a not always endearing and almost always sexist term for very attractive women. Though I don’t keep up with contemporary vernacular, I believe the modern day equivalent is “hottie.” Alas, at my age, “cruising for foxes” now has…

Paddy Rawal’s OM- Fine Indian Dining – Los Ranchos de Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

It wasn’t New Mexico’s Chamber of Commerce winter weather that enticed Chef Pramad “Paddy” Rawal to remain in the Land of Enchantment. In fact, when he first landed at Albuquerque’s International Sunport, he wondered if he had gotten on the correct flight. Albuquerque was as frigid as his home in Michigan which he had left just hours prior. Attired in clothing more appropriate for a balmy spring day, Paddy had certainly not anticipated the winter snap that kept New Mexicans indoors for several days on that uncommonly cold December in 2010. Paddy was in New Mexico to visit his artist friends Dick and Jane in Santa Fe. Michigan transplants themselves, his friends had long tried to influence Paddy to leave the Wolverine State and open up a restaurant in Santa Fe. They wined and dined their guest and did their best to point out the charms of the capital city, but Mother Nature would not cooperate. Then they took him to a couple of New Mexico’s most highly regarded Indian restaurants. That’s when he came to the conclusion that what passes for good Indian food in New Mexico wasn’t good enough for his friends. Four months later, Paddy opened up…

Chez Bob – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Even if you’ve never had the pleasure of a meal there, it’s hard not to like a restaurant named Chez Bob. Much as poetic French words are apt to do, the term “chez” seems to impart instant credibility, authenticity and just a touch of haughtiness to any restaurant sporting that appellation–even though “chez” is just a preposition which means “at the home of.” So, Chez Lucien is essentially “at the home of Lucien.”  On restaurants, the term “chez” usually prefaces the name of the chef or owner, as in Chez Pierre or Chez Emile.  The ordinary nature of the “Bob” portion of the name Chez Bob counterbalances the haughtiness of the term “chez” because Bob is one of those “every man names” we all trust. It doesn’t have those intimidating metrosexual qualities of Hollywood names such as Troy and Brad or the perceived hauteur of a French name. Bob is a vanilla name, a name your friends and neighbors might have. You would probably feel more welcome at a restaurant named “Chez Bob” than you would at one named “Chez Arnaud” which sounds more than a bit pretentious and expensive. The Bob in Chez Bob is Robert “Bob” Maw. Bob’s…

Zacatecas Tacos & Tequila – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

The diminishing of the American diner’s disposable income has posed a significant challenge for restaurateurs, particularly those who specialize in fine-dining fare. In a downtrodden economy, Americans are less willing to spend their hard-earned money on meals that cost almost as much as a utilities payment. Instead, the dining consumer has increasingly turned toward a more casual dining experience. This dining trend has prompted enterprising chefs to overhaul and upgrade comfort food favorites. In recent years, restaurateurs have transformed burgers from a ubiquitous fast-food favorite into a gourmet casual experience showcasing pricier, premium meat patties and sundry upscale ingredients. Similarly, pizzaioli are expressing themselves artistically on their crusty canvasses with creative ingredients heretofore not available on pizza. Even such humble comfort food favorites as mac-and-cheese and the grilled cheese sandwich have metamorphosed from plain and boring to glorious and inventive. Though these gourmet versions of foodstuff from humble beginnings might cost just a bit more, they’re not nearly as steep as the fine-dining experience diners might have opted for in better times. It stands to reason that the previously pedestrian taco would eventually evolve, too. So says PBS who took the pulse of esteemed chefs and culinary professionals across the…

Chile Rio Mexican Grill – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

In as delicious a dichotomy as you’ll find on any novel, the chapter from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory which most terrorized and traumatized children actually provides glorious fantasy material for many adults.  In that memorable chapter, a gluttonous brat child named Augustus Gloop falls into a Chocolate River and is sucked through a pipe into a room in which fudge is manufactured.  By being squeezed through the pipe, Augustus’s once endomorphic body (described in the novel as “fat bulging from every fold, with two greedy eyes peering out of his dough ball of a head“) is transformed and he emerges as an extremely svelte shadow of his former self.  For calorically overachieving chocoholic adults who struggle with the battle of the bulge, the notion of falling into a river of indulgent chocolate then being sucked into a pipe and coming out thin is fantasy indeed.  While some adults might prefer that the river of chocolate be a brook of beer, the food fantasy of true New Mexicans who love our official state vegetable is to fall into a river of rich, delicious chile grown in the Land of Enchantment.  That, alas, is fantasy.  In the real world, we…

Cafe Istanbul – Albuquerque, New Mexico

One of the most common responses given as to why people choose to retire in Santa Fe is “because it’s so different.” While it may be true that the “City Different” is different from where respondents came, some native New Mexicans like my buddy Mike Muller postulate that Santa Fe has become the “City Same.” He’s talking about the architectural standards and city ordinances whose uniformity threaten to make Santa Fe a model of adobe-hued homogeneity. Mike points out that Santa Fe’s boring “sameness” hasn’t quite caught up with Albuquerque which in comparison is the rebellious kid in oversized jeans with underwear exposed to Santa Fe’s straight-laced, Catholic uniform-attired school girl. For evidence he points out two architectural anomalies which would not make it in Santa Fe. One is the United Blood Services building whose sanguine facade can be seen a mile away. The other is the bright yellow building on Wyoming which houses Cafe Istanbul, a Mediterranean Grocery Store and Deli. In truth, Cafe Istanbul isn’t quite as bright today as it was in 2001 when Nick and Del Akkad launched their specialty store and deli. New Mexico’s bright sun has dulled the bright yellow somewhat, but it’s still…

Vinaigrette – Santa Fe, New Mexico

During a 1994 episode of Seinfeld, Elaine’s boss, Mr. Pitt becomes obsessed with finding a spaceship obfuscated within a stereogram, a computer-generated image that presents an optical illusion in which a 3D image is hidden within a single 2D image to be revealed only when the viewer focuses his or her eyes correctly.  To the detriment of a pressing business deal, Mr. Pitts loses three days trying to find the spaceship.  First he tries blurring his eyes as if staring straight through the picture before eventually finding success by employing an intensely deep focus. Placitas resident Gary W. Priester calls creating 3D stereographic images his “all-consuming passion for almost 15 years.”  Gary has authored three books on stereogram images and is one of two contributors to a Japanese stereogram magazine series which has sold close to four-million copies.  His work is mesmerizing in its ability to captivate the viewer.  Fortunately for those of us who don’t always focus correctly, Gary does us all a favor on his Custom Stereographic Web site by explaining exactly how to see stereograms. Gary’s clarity and focus aren’t  limited solely to stereograms.  He’s become a trusted advisor on dining options I might not otherwise know…