Quesadilla Grille – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

 Grandma: “Tonight, me and your aunt are gonna go visit some friends and we’re not gonna be back till tomorrow. We’re gettin’ a little low on steak, so I got Lyle comin’ over tomorrow to take care of it.” Napoleon: “Well, what’s there to eat?” Grandma: “Knock it off, Napoleon. Make yourself a dang quesadilla!” Napoleon: “Fine!” “Gosh!”  It took a cult movie about a high school misfit lacking all the skills girls like–such as nunchaku skills, bow hunting skills and computer hacking skills–for the humble quesadilla to became a pop culture meme. Described by movie critic Roger Ebert as “the kind of nerd other nerds avoid,” Napoleon Dynamite was the quintessential dorky loser, a carrot-topped dweeb who lived with his grandmother and subsisted on a diet consisting largely of steak and tater tots. Napoleon’s grandmother not only dissed the quesadilla with the inference that this beloved treat is a dang second rate  afterthought, she had the effrontery to pronounce it “kay-saw-dill-aw,”  a pronunciation waiters and waitresses throughout New Mexico hear every day from visitors not necessarily from Napoleon’s home state of Idaho.  Because of Napoleon’s grandmother, Urban Dictionary now defines the quesadilla as “Something you want to make when…

Il Mulino of New York – Las Vegas, Nevada (CLOSED)

While it may seem that Las Vegas is one perpetual bachelor party with hundreds of drunken frat boys expressing themselves loudly through expletives while leaving a hazy trail of smoke in their wake as they converge upon casino after casino, Sin City does have its pockets of civility.  One such refuge is Il Mulino during the lunch hour when it’s a veritable island of isolation and paragon of propriety despite being mere feet from the maddening throngs.  Perhaps it’s that aspect of propriety that explains the absence of teeming masses during lunch. Yes, it’s THAT Il Mulino, scion of the famous Italian restaurant held in reverential esteem and cited by the cognoscenti as perhaps the very best Italian restaurant in all of the five boroughs comprising New York City (although Mario Batali might have something to say about that).   The Las Vegas outpost of the fabulous Metropolis Italian restaurant is located at the top level of the Forum Shops at Caesars next door to Tommy Bahama.  The setting is so elegant, the ambiance so splendorous that you’ll quickly forget the proximal partiers. It’s not the crapulous carousers who frequent Il Mulino at night, but a more conservative, nattily attired crowd…

I Love Sushi – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

According to the US Census Bureau, more than half (49.3) of all Americans reported they did not “dine out” between Fall, 2009 and Fall, 2011. That’s the lowest percentage since 2007 and could be indicative of the pervasive economic malaise or perhaps of the uncertainty as to what constitutes “dining out.”  The Census Bureau did not define the term so it’s conceivable “dining out” was interpreted as a meal at a “fancy restaurant” with table service and a wine menu as opposed to say, a meal at a fast food restaurant or  picking up a burger from a food truck. One data point the Census Bureau did not research is the percentage of people who don’t like sushi.  A sushi chef acquaintance tells me sushi isn’t something people merely just “like” or are indifferent to.  They either love it or hate it.  He contends that most, not all, people who claim to hate it have never tried really good sushi.  A quick perusal through Google seemingly contradicts his theory, revealing numerous sites and Facebook pages dedicated to the derision of sushi.  In almost all cases, the haters had tried sushi and found it not to their liking (to say the…

Ezra’s Place – Los Ranchos de Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

When it comes to food, most bowling alleys strike out.  Ardent keglers are subjected to such catastrophic “cuisine” as perpetually rotating hot dogs seared to a leathery sheen under a heat lamp inferno, soppy messes of nachos bathed in gloppy processed cheese topped with gelatinous jalapeños and greasy onion rings with the texture of fried rubber bands and as oily as well-slicked lanes.  Getting something edible at most bowling alleys is as tough as picking up a seven-ten split. Los Ranchos de Albuquerque has somehow managed to buck the national trend of bad bowling alley food–or at least the Lucky 66 Bowling Alley on Fourth Street has.  The Lucky 66 (then known as Sun Valley Bowl) was once the home of Sadie’s Dining Room, one of the Duke City area’s most popular dining destinations.  After Sadie’s split for more commodious confines, Dean’s Mexican Food moved in and fed Duke City bowlers and diners in the know for a few years.  When Dean’s departed, other victual vendors tried, but couldn’t pin down the secrets to success in serving food at a bowling alley Visitors to the historical Fourth Street bowling alley will notice colorful signage on the exterior north-facing wall of the yawning…

JR’s Bar-B-Que – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Ryan Scott, the affable host of the enlightening and entertaining Break the Chain radio program has rapidly become the voice for Albuquerque’s mom-and-pop restaurants.  When it comes to celebrating the Duke City’s independent eateries, he’s like E.F. Hutton in that when he speaks, people listen…literally.  The Break the Chain Web site receives more than 10,000 visits per week, many visitors stopping by to catch up on programs they may have missed or more likely, listening to those they enjoyed most a second (or tenth) time. While Ryan is unabashed in his promotion of New Mexico’s non-chain restaurants, he will admit to being a snob about only one type of food.  That’s barbecue.  Ryan won’t hesitate to tell you he hasn’t found barbecue greatness anywhere in New Mexico.  He’s found good barbecue (his favorite being Josh’s in Santa Fe), but he’ll tell you if you want great barbecue, you’ve got to visit our neighbor to the east.  He should know.  His beautiful better half Kimber is from the Houston area where Ryan lived for a few years. Ryan has major street cred when it comes to barbecue.  He smokes his own meats at home–as in low and slow over fruit woods,…

Fu Yuang – Albuquerque, New Mexico

“I’ve eaten a river of liver and an ocean of fish! I’ve eaten so much fish, I’m ready to grow gills! I’ve eaten so much liver, I can only make love if I’m smothered in bacon and onions” ~ Hawkeye Pierce MASH 4077, Korea FROM THE FU YUANG FACEBOOK PAGE: Our Dear Fu Yuang friends, we closed the doors for business on Saturday, November 21st, 2020. 😢 Mia is no longer able to meet the physical demands of operating the restaurant. We tried to sell the restaurant to many prospective buyers, with no luck due to COVID-19. We want to thank everyone for their kindness, dedication, & support over the past 26 1/2 years. We will truly miss you all. Thanks for all the memories we have made together at Fu Yuang! For eleven years, televisions across the fruited plain were tuned in to CBS where the antics of the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital (MASH) enthralled audiences with a unique blend of crude hilarity and heartfelt humanity.  Set in South Korea during the Korean War, the series centered around a group of resilient doctors, nurses and support staff in an isolated hospital compound which saw more than its share…

4 Aces Grill – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

As a proud native New Mexican, my chest still swells with pride whenever I travel outside the Land of Enchantment (even to Texas, Arizona and Colorado) and espy a vehicle displaying the license plate of the great state of New Mexico.  I’m not the only one.  While stopping for gas in Iowa a few years ago, a couple from Roswell noticed our license plate and excitedly came over to find out where in New Mexico we were from.  We wound up having lunch together, all the while discussing the great state in which we all live in. For citizens of the fruited plain not fortunate enough to live in New Mexico, seeing our state’s license plate within their borders evokes curiosity, especially if they’re attentive enough to notice that it reads “New Mexico U.S.A.”  As the “One of Our Fifty is Missing” column in New Mexico Magazine has demonstrated for more than a quarter of a century, many of our fellow American citizens and ill-informed bureaucrats don’t even realize that New Mexico is part of the United States.  When the unwashed and uninformed masses aren’t wondering if we’re carrying our passports as we cross their borders, they’re  curious about the…

India Palace – Albuquerque, New Mexico (CLOSED)

When many of us think of romantic destinations to visit or in which to honeymoon, our choices probably mirror closely those of US News & World Report which listed among their 22 best honeymoon destinations such exotic locations as Kauai, Maui, Florence, Crete, Santorini and even Las Vegas, Nevada.  The authors apparently didn’t think enchantment is synonymous with romance or wedded  bliss because no New Mexico locations made the list,  Surprisingly, neither did any destination in India.  Not everyone equates India with romance, but its ancient legends, history and monuments are rich with tales of profound love.  One of the world’s most far-famed love offerings is the opulent and ethereal Taj Mahal, built by a grieving emperor in memory of his dearly beloved wife and queen.  India also gave the world the Kama Sutra, an ancient Hindu text widely recognized as a definitive guide to the nature of love and the pleasure-oriented aspects of human life.  Hindus understood the importance of fore foreplay, paying significant attention to light, music, touch, smell, drink and food before moving on to carnal pleasures. Sensual, tactile, pleasurable–those adjectives are probably used more frequently to describe the practices of the Kama Sutra, it wouldn’t be…

Greenside Cafe – Cedar Crest, New Mexico (CLOSED)

In order to provide quality services, municipalities everywhere, but especially in growing urban areas, rely heavily on gross receipts taxes from sources such as hotels and restaurants.  Cedar Crest, New Mexico, is no different from other cities in that it would like not only for its citizenry to spend as much disposable income as possible within the village, it courts an external revenue stream from visitors. From 1961 through 1999–one of Cedar Crest’s most reliable sources of gross receipts revenue was the legendary Bella Vista Restaurant, a sprawling wooden edifice which during its halcyon days accommodated 1,200 dining patrons and served an unlimited number of all-you-can-eat platters of fried chicken and fish.  When the Bella Vista launched during the onset of the Kennedy administration, Cedar Crest had very few amenities. The Bella Vista helped changed that.  For nearly four decades, cavalcades of motorists made their way to the backside of the Sandias to fill their bellies without emptying their wallets.  Many would stay. The Bella Vista was a landmark, a true dining destination, which on weekends courted so many visitors that two-hour waits for tables on weekends were the norm.  In 1999, the Bernalillo County Fire Department shuttered the restaurant’s doors…

Blue Ribbon Bar & Grill – Estancia, New Mexico (CLOSED)

Unlike diners throughout New Mexico, bears in the Sandias and Manzanos  have found food in their mountain habitats very scarce, forcing them to forage populated areas for their fill.  As of August 25th, 2011, the New Mexico Game and Fish Department had received 141 reports of bear sightings from Placitas to Belen, communities west of the mountains.  In 2010, food shortages resulted in 467 reports of bear sightings in the Sandias and Manzanos, 251 of them west of the mountains. Visit Estancia, New Mexico and you’re likely to encounter more Bears in one hour than residents along the Sandias and Manzanos will see in an entire year. So many, in fact, that you’d think they own the town.  Bears walk around brazenly, proudly sporting seasonal reddish hues.  They stride into restaurants and shops where they’re welcomed like the old friends and neighbors they are.  That’s what life in a small community is like. The Estancia Bears varsity sports teams are the only game in town and every resident of this close-knit community about half an hour east of Albuquerque’s Big I interchange is a fan.  Local businesses carry Estancia Bears merchandise–shirts, baseball caps, beverage cups, coasters and more.  Bears schedules…

Zia Diner – Santa Fe, New Mexico (CLOSED)

In the year 1880, La Villa Real de la Santa Fé de San Francisco de Asís” (“The Royal Town of the Holy Faith of St. Francis of Assisi”) bore little semblance to the popular vacation destination and tourist town it is today.  In fact, it was still pretty much a dusty frontier town of the old west with statehood more than a quarter century away.  Despite a population growth of nearly forty percent over the previous decade, Santa Fe was hardly considered a burgeoning center for commerce, much less tourism.  That would all change with the arrival of the Atchison, Topeka and Santa Fe Railway Company, an event which heralded a new period of prosperity and growth. The railroad facilitated trade between the New Mexico territory and the United States.  In addition to trade in dry goods, foodstuffs, clothing and books, the railroad ferried materials such as bricks and galvanized tin which paved the way for architectural diversity.  The facade of the Santa Fe Plaza, for example, would be transformed from a Spanish-Pueblo architectural style to a hybrid Spanish-Pueblo-Territorial style that persists today.  Victorian style brick buildings became very much in vogue throughout the town.  The arrival of the railroad …