Nagomi Japanese Restaurant – Albuquerque, New Mexico

Everyman philosopher Homer Simpson once posed the profound existential question “Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?” One thing at which donuts seem especially adept is ensnaring the hearts and affections of youth—and not just American youth. The Huffington Post reported recently that in Japan, “the younger generation is increasingly eating Krispy Kreme doughnuts and McDonald’s, not rice.” Fast food chains such as the aforementioned Krispy Kreme and McDonald’s as well as Kentucky Fried Chicken, Domino’s Pizza and others have become ubiquitous in Japan—much to the detriment of traditional Japanese culinary traditions, many of which are closely linked to family relations. The popularity of fast food is the likely culprit for the steep decline in annual rice consumption across the Land of the Rising Sun. In recent decades, rice consumption has fallen 17 percent, from 9.44 million tons to 7.81 million tons per year. According to the Post, the fast food diet and its “spicy oily food” has also largely decimated the ability of young people to discern “umami,” a fundamental taste in the Japanese palate along with sweet, sour, salty and bitter. The exodus from Japanese culinary traditions has also had an esthetic impact. While Japanese food and its…

Effingbar and Grill – Albuquerque, New Mexico

The late comedian and beloved social critic George Carlin might be surprised at how far America has come (some might say how much we’ve regressed) when it comes to uttering foul invectives, especially the “seven words” he postulated “you can never say on television.” While most of us still won’t vocalize the infamous “F-word” in polite company, its diminutive version has become part of our vernacular. Whether on screen or in print (or on shirts emblazoned with the abbreviation F.U. (which doesn’t stand for Florida University)) it’s “F this” and “F that.” It’s been said that the F-word is the most versatile word in the English language in that it can be used as an action verb, passive verb, adverb, noun, adjective and even conjunction. Make it a gerund by adding “ing” and the F-word’s utility as an adjective is virtually unlimited. Like something and it’s “effing great.” Hate something and it “effing stinks.” At the very least, a bar and grill with the unique name “Effingbar and Grill” will get your attention. It’s not until you visit that you’ll determine whether it’s effing good or effing bad. Our server jokingly apprised us that the “effing” part of the bar…

Back Road Pizza – Santa Fe, New Mexico

My brother George has the right idea! Rather than braving the motoring madness that is traversing New Mexico’s highways at breakneck speeds and risking life and limb contending with America’s worst drivers (according to a 2014 report by Wallet Hub), he’ll take the back roads every chance he gets. Not only does he avoid frazzled nerves and minimize potential encounters with distracted, drunk and demolition derby caliber drivers, he gets to enjoy the scenery of enchantment and arrive at his destination unscathed. His blood pressure is better than mine. George will enjoy Santa Fe’s Back Road Pizza and not only because he doesn’t have to spend much time on Cerrillos to get there and not only because the street on which it’s situated has a posted speed limit of only 25 miles-per-hour. The pizza is very good, maybe even “worth risking rush hour to get there” good. Who says it’s good? The pizza-loving denizens of the City Different seem to accord it “best pizza” honors perennially in the Santa Fe Reporter‘s annual “best of” polls. It’s been one of Santa Fe’s “top 40 favorite restaurants” for more than eleven years running according to The Reporter who has also designated it…

Katrinah’s East Mountain Grill – Edgewood, New Mexico

It’s interesting that the New Mexico State Constitution bars “idiots” and “insane persons” from voting, but quips about votes being cast by dead people, family pets and farm animals have been pervasive over the years in some counties and municipalities. In some of the same counties and municipalities, the saying “vote early and vote often” has seemed more a way of life than an aphorism. Not all citizens of the Land of Enchantment exercise their right to vote, but some, it seems, exercise it vigorously…and often. Perhaps realizing the enthusiasm some New Mexicans have for the right to vote, the New Mexico Tourism Department allowed them to cast their vote daily for their favorite breakfast burrito in the statewide Breakfast Burrito Byway contest and tourism initiative. Voters cast some 46,766 votes for their favorites among 400 nominated restaurants. The top fifty vote-getters became “founding members” of the inaugural Byway. Katrinah’s East Mountain Grill in Edgewood garnered the most votes, tallying 2,623 votes (not quite one vote per resident in the community of 3,379 souls). In a “get the vote out” campaign utilizing Facebook, whiteboards and the ever-effective personal touch, Katrinah’s proved that in New Mexico the popular vote still counts…

Del Charro Saloon – Santa Fe, New Mexico

Can it truly be that the more things change, the more they stay the same? In 1776, Fermin de Mendinueta, governor and captain-general of the Spanish province of New Mexico, declared that “Santa Fe settlers are “churlish types” who are “accustomed to live apart from each other, as neither fathers nor sons associate with each other.” In 2013, Travel & Leisure published a list of America’s “snobbiest cities” and Santa Fe made the list at number five. The list was based on surveys of the magazine’s readers. Mayor at the time David Cross attributed the perception of Santa Fe snobbery to the enjoyment of the arts, a point validated by the article which quoted a writer as saying “without a certain appearance or air about yourself, gallery owners barely acknowledge you when you walk in.” Then there’s the former Santa Fe restaurateurs who had a very strict “no fragrance” (as in no eau de toilette, eau de parfum and even no Old Spice) policy at their splendorific Italian restaurant. Even some food snobs believed that was taking haughtiness too far. Fortunately Santa Fe has its own version of the place where everybody knows your name…and if they don’t, they’ll still…

The Alley Cantina – Taos, New Mexico

In April, 2014, Gallup conducted a poll to determine state pride across the United States. More precisely, the Gallup poll surveyed people in all 50 states to find out what percentage of residents say their state was the very best or one of the best places to live. Sadly, New Mexico was rated the six worst state to live with only 28 percent of respondents indicating the Land of Enchantment was one of the best places to live. New Mexico was the only state among the bottom ten either not bordering or not East of the Mississippi River. In recent years it seems every quality of life survey conducted lists New Mexico near the very bottom where we compete with Mississippi and Arkansas for “worst” in virtually every aspect of daily life. So, what does it say about New Mexico when it is rated number one…that’s first…in the auspicious category of being “absolutely absorbed by the abnormal?” To arrive at this rating, the Moveto Real Estate Blog actually used Facebook data to determine what percentage of each state’s population had an interest in the paranormal, psychic phenomena, conspiracy and shadow organizations and mythical creatures and mysterious beings. Research indicated that…

Stray Dog Cantina – Taos Ski Valley, New Mexico

There’s a rather ominous sign on the base of the Taos Ski Valley. In bold red uppercase print, the sign reads “DON’T PANIC!,” a preface for somewhat more reassuring text: “YOU’RE LOOKING AT ONLY 1/30 OF TAOS SKI VALLEY. WE HAVE MANY EASY RUNS TOO!” To novice skiers, the steepness of the ski runs visible from the base may as well be the “I’d turn back if I were you” sign Dorothy and her friends encountered when they entered the Haunted Forest on the way to the castle of the Wicked Witch of the West. No doubt the less skilled schussers turn tail like the Cowardly Lion and head for flatter topography. There’s another boldface type warning at another Taos Ski Valley landmark. This one is for the meek of taste bud and gastrointestinal system. The menu at the Stray Dog Cantina warns “Caution: Our chile is not for amateurs. It’s extra tasty, but it can be spicy – it is serious chile.” It’s obvious this warning is intended primarily for out-of-state visitors unaccustomed to their food biting back. For citizens of the Land of Enchantment, such a warning is akin to a red flag being waved at a charging…

Geoffrey’s Malibu – Malibu, California

The walls at Geoffrey’s Malibu are festooned with copies of whimsical framed “doodles” created by Hollywood celebrities and movie stars who have dined at the posh seaside restaurant. Most are tongue-in-cheek self-portraits which probably speak volumes about the glitterati themselves–and not just whether they lack or are blessed with an artistic talent beyond their particular medium. Thematically, all the portraits include a heart. That’s because Harvey Baskin, the restaurant’s previous owner asked the artists to donate originals for publication and sale in support of a charity for children with heart disease. Jane Russell’s heart forms her shapely derriere at the terminus of legs which would otherwise go on forever. George Burns’ bespectacled heart puffs on one of his beloved cigars. Tony Bennett may have left his heart in San Francisco, but at Geoffrey’s Malibu it reputedly spans the Brooklyn Bridge. Geoffrey’s neighbor Johnny Carson, obviously knowing his limitations, drew a simple heart and signed his name beneath it. Woody Allen was clearly in his trademark dispirited disposition when he drew a broken heart The fact that guests can dine at Geoffrey’s Malibu and not even notice the celebrity caricatures is a testament to the spectacular beauty surrounding the cliff-side restaurant…

Norton’s Pastrami & Deli – Santa Barbara, California

“I flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami.” ~George Costanza January 14th has been designated “National Hot Pastrami Sandwich day.” The fact that a day has been designated to honor the greatness of the “most sensual of all the salted and cured meats” is wholly unnecessary for many of us. True pastrami paramours in the mold of Dagwood Bumstead, Shaggy Rogers, Joey Tribbiani and my friend Bill Resnik, don’t need a special reason or designated day to partake of pulchritudinous pastrami. To us, every day is pastrami sandwich day! Now, if your experiences with pastrami have been limited to the packaged Boar’s Head offering or worse, an occasional Subway pastrami sandwich, you’re probably wondering what the big deal is about pastrami. Offer Boar’s Head or Subway’s version of pastrami to a foodie from the East Coast or the West Coast, however, and you may as well be offering them snake tartare. If you’ve ever had pastrami from either Coast, you’ll understand why. Pastrami is deli food. It’s not meant to be extricated from a hermetically sealed package or consumed at a chain sandwich shop. Nor is it intended to be lean and trim. Pastrami is a rich…

Opal Restaurant and Bar – Santa Barbara, California

We’re all familiar with premise of Iron Chef America in which accomplished chefs are pitted against the veritable pantheon of culinary giants who have earned the title of Iron Chef. Can you imagine if one of the vaunted Iron Chefs, or even one of the challengers for that matter, failed to present the judges a variety of ways in which the “secret ingredient” is used? How, for example, would the oft-haughty judges react if during “battle rice” Iron Chef Morimoto presented seven different sushi rolls? Though not led by Iron Chefs, there are a number of fusion restaurants across the fruited plain where you’d swear all the dishes served have a “one-note” flavor profile (usually cloying), the only significant difference being the plating. Conceptually the dishes sound fabulous, but their execution leaves a lot to be desired. Such fusion restaurants perform a tremendous disservice not only to their guests, but to the cuisines they are purporting to showcase in creative manners. Perhaps that’s why Santa Barbara, California resident and former Iron Chef Cat Cora loves Opal Restaurant and Bar so much. Opal actually lives up to the promise of culinary diversity and creativity with one of the most interesting and…

Trattoria Mollie – Montecito, California

In its three best-selling editions–published in 2006, 2008 and 2012–National Geographic’s “Passport to the Best” has enthralled, excited and educated connoisseurs of matters of taste across the globe. With top ten lists in dozens of categories studded with savvy tips and inspiring imagery, this wayfarer’s bible invigorates investigative yearnings for exotic travel, if for nothing else to confirm or refute the opinion of the authors. Still, when the “Passport to the Best” recognized Trattoria Mollie in Montecito, California as “one of the “Ten Best Destination & Special Restaurants in the World,” the honor was probably lost on much of the popular culture demographic. Trattoria Mollie has instead garnered much more fame and acclaim courtesy of a rousing endorsement from media mogul Oprah Whitney than from any source. Oprah reportedly dined at the swank Montecito restaurant every day during the summer of 2006, most often–if not exclusively–enjoying an entree showcasing three turkey meatballs studded with raisins. It’s an entree she introduced to President Obama during his visit to Trattoria Mollie. So impressed was Oprah that she also introduced Chef Mollie Ahlstrand to the world on both her popular show and “O” magazine. As her annual “Oprah’s Favorite Things” episode consistently proved,…